Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, May 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#344)
DON'T FORGET TO CHEW THE WATER
The Indian government releases thousands of scavenger turtles into the Ganges River each year
to help it recycle thousands of decomposing human bodies thrown into it each year. Whole corpses, along with partially cremated bodies,
are traditionally thrown into this river by Hindus who believe the water has Holy properties. (Third class families, of which there are
millions, usually can not afford to buy enough wood to properly cremate their loved ones. So, symbolically, they burn what they can,
then throw the rest into the river.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#345)
HE SAID A MOUTHFUL ADMITTING HE WANTED A HANDFUL
The Dallas grocery chain Minyard's pulled the November 1993 issue of Discovery magazine
because the cover photo showed a sculpture of two apes with their genitals exposed. "When it shows the genitals or the breasts,"
Minyard's president Jay L. Williams said, "We're going to pull it." (Let's hope his hands were soft, too.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#346)
THE ALBATROSS FOR ALL TAXPAYERS: POLITICAL EGO
During a visit to Denver, by then Vice President Al Gore (1993-2001), Hamlet Barry III, chief
of that City's water department, decided the South Platte River looked too shallow to serve as a backdrop for Gore's riverfront photo
opportunity, so he raised the water level by releasing 96 millions gallons. The Rocky Mountain News reported the water's value
at $59,000, which would have supplied nearly 300 families for a year.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, May 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#347)
WELL, AT LEAST HIS APARTMENT STAYED CLEAN
Jermund Skogstad, 50, of Oslo, Norway, moved into his new apartment, then immediately left to
shop for food. Unfortunately, he forgot his wallet, which had his new address inside, and soon he realized he could not find his way
back to his new apartment. "How embarrassing," he told a local newspaper a month later, hoping his new landlady, to whom he had paid a
months rent in advance, might read his story in the paper.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, May 05, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#348)
BUT HOW? SHE/HE'S NOT EQUIPPED WITH SNAP-ON TOOLS
Dr. Janis Ashley told a Sedalia, Missouri, newspaper she would soon have a sex-change operation
so she could find a wife and raise a family. She had been a woman for 11 years, following her first sex-change operation.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, May 06, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#349)
MICKEY MOUSE AND DONALD DUCK EXPOSED!
After visiting Disneyland, Billy Jean Matey filed a lawsuit in Orange County, California,
claiming she and her grandchildren suffered from negligence and emotional distress inflicted on them because they caught a glimpse of
Disney characters taking off their costumes, "exposing the children to the reality of the fact that the characters are only make believe."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, May 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#350)
HE TRIED BEATING THE LAW BY BEATING HIS ATTORNEYS
When a court in Stockholm, Sweden, barred John Asonius, 41, from taping his trial, he took his
recorder and beat the heads of both his court appointed defense attorneys. After guards were able to subdue the defendant, and his
attorneys were able to stop bleeding and receive medical treatment, his trial began again, with his attorneys sitting at a respectful
distance.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, May 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#351)
A LITTLE EXTRA SHAKING GOING ON BESIDES THAT EARTHQUAKE
When U.S. corporations sent relief supplies to India's Maharashtra state after the 1993
earthquake, items included were dental floss, contact lens cleaner and lubricants for sexual intimacy.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#352)
PERHAPS HE HIMSELF SUFFERED FROM "ALL IN THE FAMILY"
A state representative from Louisiana, Carl Gunter, opposed an exception to an anti-abortion
bill for victims of incest, saying "Inbreeding is how we get championship horses."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#353)
WE THE PEOPLE, FOR THE PEOPLE.............NOT
The U.S. Government announced in October 1994 it would reduce funding for food banks and other
programs that fed Americans living below the poverty line by $55 million. The same day, the same U.S. Government announced it would
spend $47 million to train Haiti's police force.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be
published, broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, May 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#354)
SOMEBODY CALL THE COPS!.... ON NO!... THEY IS THEM!
As many as one hundred New York Police
officers, described by Police Commissioner William Bratton as "morons and
nitwits," went on a drunken rampage at a downtown Washington, D.C., hotel.
Witnesses said officers fired their weapons into the air, groped women,
sprayed fire extinguishers, stripped naked and set off fire alarms. After a
two month investigation, one officer resigned and twenty-nine were
reprimanded for taking their guns out of state.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, May 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#355)
TRY AND FIND SANE REASONING IN THIS
Just before Christmas
2003, ABC NEWS reported the Mexico City Police Department
had announced it would not arrest drunk drivers on either
Christmas Eve or New Year's Eve because "Most people are
home on those two nights anyway."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, May 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#354)
IF ALIVE, THE JUDGE
COULD'VE SENTENCED HIM TO A HALF-WAY HOUSE
Authorities found a body
half-way through a basement window, in Williamsport,
Pennsylvania. A would-be burglar, wearing a heavy coat and
two sweaters against the severe cold, had become stuck
squeezing through the 15" by 18" window.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, May 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#357)
NOR CAN HE PASS GO AND
COLLECT $200
Jorge Rodriquez, 22,
spoke no English and had no lawyer when he appeared in a
Kenosha, Wisconsin, court on charges of drunk driving. But
he still appeared cheerful and confident as he approached
the judge and handed over a GET OUT OF JAIL FREE card, which
that county sheriff's opponent in the upcoming election had
printed thousands of.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, May 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#358)
A PARTICULARLY PESKY
PIECE OF PARANOIA
Several years before his
overthrow, in December 1989, Romanian dictator Nicolae
Ceaucescu (1918-1989) responded to critical letters written
by Romanians to Radio Free Europe by ordering hand writing
samples be taken of each and every Romanian citizen, meaning
approximately 20 million samples would be required to
satisfy his sick mind. (He didn't even have copies of the
letters to compare.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#359)
HOLY BROWN MESS! HOPE NO
ONE WAS INSIDE
Back in the late 1990s
the U.S. Army tested an air-defense gun named "Sergeant
York". It was designed to home-in on the whirling blades of
helicopters and propeller-driven aircraft. Instead, it
ignored the chopper targets and demolished a ventilating
fan, as well as the outdoor toilet underneath.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#360)
CARE TO GET DRUNK AND
DONATE?
Dr. Maurice Nelligan,
one of Ireland's leading heart surgeons, blamed the police
for running such a successful campaign against drunk
driving, it had caused a shortage of transplantable organs.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, May 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#361)
GOT A BAD MARRIAGE? EAT
GARLIC
At the first
International Workshop on Bad Breath, held in Tel Aviv,
Shlomo Goren, a former chief rabbi of Israel, declared bad
breath is a legitimate reason for divorce. He said several
couples had been granted divorces because of halitosis.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, May 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#362)
WONDER IF HE STOLE THE
SHOW?
Gordon Benjamin was
granted parole from a Shirley, Massachusetts,
maximum-security state prison, but decided to remain behind
bars for two more months in order to appear as Sir Lancelot
in an inmate production of Camelot.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#363)
HE MUST'VE GIVEN THAT
JUDGE A GOOD TIP?
In New Castle,
Pennsylvania, Judge Ralph Pratt sentenced Albert Mangino to
30 days behind bars for drunk driving. His Honor then
completed the sentencing by giving Mr. Mangino work release
status so he could leave jail each day and go to his usual
work, betting on horses at West Virginia racetracks.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, May 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#364)
THEY WERE PLEASED THEIR
CAR WAS STOLEN
When Dallas police told
Charlie and Sharon Reed their banana-yellow 1978 Volkswagen
convertible had been recovered they were very happy. And
they were even happier when they inspected their vehicle at
the police pound. Before its theft, their little car had a
cracked windshield and a smashed rear end. Now it had a new
windshield, new bumper, new fenders and a paint
job.......and a full tank of gas.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, May 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#365)
HE NEEDED A 'CLEAN' JAR
FILLER
According to ABC's Paul
Harvey News, a young man in Illinois named Copps was on
probation for marijuana possession, and was required to take
a urine test every 30 days. But, rather than give up the
habit, he obtained his urine sample from his cousin.
Unfortunately, that urine sample proved the probationer had
changed over from smoking pot to using cocaine.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#366)
THIS MENTALITY: FROM
FATHER AND BROTHER ONE AND THE SAME?
While the world moved
forward in the 1960s, in Gaston County, North Carolina, a
group of parents were demanding all maps used in classrooms
have both Germany and "all" African countries removed
because they said those countries were all "antichristian."
These parents also demanded the Greek alphabet not be taught
because the Greeks endorsed homosexuality.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#367)
PICTURE THIS HAPPENING
TO YOU
A tour operator was sued
by a German couple who had taken a Caribbean cruise to enjoy
Calypso music they were never able to hear. That's because
most of the other 600 passengers on board were members of
the Swiss Union of Friends of Folk Music. According to the
lawsuit, most of the 600 yodeled day and night for the
entire 14-days-and-and-nights at sea. A Frankfurt District
Court ordered a refund of one-third of the couples $4,478
fare.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, May 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#368)
HE WAS ANXIOUS TO WRITE
A LONG NOVEL, NO DOUBT
A stroke victim
hospitalized in a Berkeley, California, could only
communicate with his eyes, one blink meaning "yes" and two
blinks meaning "no", until a local group raised $4,000 to
purchase a special computer so he could write sentences with
only the slightest touch of his finger. Once everything was
installed, and the silent man could express his most needed
need, he typed 21 letters and three spaces, which read,
"PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE!!!"
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, May 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#369)
"HIS EYES HAVE SEEN THE
GLORY OF THE......"
Guatemalan President
Jorge Serrano Elias defended himself against television
footage showing the born-again Christian leaving a New York
City topless club, by blaming leftist guerrilla
"manipulation" of the video tape.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, May 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#370)
WHY? THOSE NUMBERS
DIDN'T BRING HIM ANY LUCK
The New York State
Lottery had to suspend the numbers 3569 by noon on December
27, 1989, because too many people had selected those
numbers. Why? New York Yankees' manager Billy Martin had
been killed a few days before in an accident, and the
license plate number on the truck was VR3569.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, May 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#371)
STICKS HIT BALLS, MEN
GET RICH
In January 2004, Larry
Powell, columnist for The Dallas Morning News, quoted from
that paper's archives in 1966, "Single-season homer king and
two-time American League MVP Roger Maris, 31, agrees to a
$70,000-a-year contract with the New York Yankees." In that
same 2004 newspaper, the Associated Press reported,
"Two-time American League MVP former Ranger Juan Gonzalez
agreed Tuesday to a one-year contract with the Kansas City
Royals that guarantees him $4.5 million."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, May 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#372)
GUESS THEY DON'T KEEP UP
WITH "THE COLONIES" MUCH?
According to ABC's Paul
Harvey News, when a musical about a U.S. city opened in
London, 65% of people questioned there had no idea which
city it was about, even though the title of the production
was CHICAGO.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#373)
A MODERN MUMMY MAYBE?
Police in the state of
Washington labeled the death of Christian Agar, 27,
"suspicious" after his body was found along side U.S.
Highway 101 covered entirely from head-to-toe in duct tape.
(Perhaps he committed suicide?)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#374)
FLUFFY GOT FLATTENED
A Berlin Heights, Ohio,
couple sued a local pizza company for $125,000, saying a bad
pizza had caused the death of their dog. The suit claimed a
pizza they tried to eat was so rotten and moldy, it made
them ill. Therefore, it was the pizza company's fault, when
they backed out rushing to a hospital, and backed over their
poor dog Fluffy. (Fluffy wasn't fluffy anymore.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, June 1, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#375)
GETTING "PERKS" IN
PRISON
The Dayton, Ohio,
Daily News reported the Pentagon was providing salaries
and benefits for 680 military personnel behind bars for such
crimes as murder, rape and child molestation. This error
alone cost taxpayers more than $1 million a month. (Someone
once wrote, people will get as much government as they are
willing to tolerate.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, June 2, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#376)
PICTURE OWLS WEARING
BARF BAGS
Some years ago the
Illinois state legislature gave the Department of
Conservation $180,000 to create a program to study the
contents of owl vomit, to determine what foods owls ate
during different seasons. (But don't they eat bugs and mice
in spring, bugs and mice in summer, bugs and mice in fall,
bugs and mice in winter?)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, June 3, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#377)
THEY NEEDED MATERNITY
TOPS, NOT T-SHIRTS
Ghanaian police officer
Mustapha Garbah testified in an Accra court that he pulled
over a Ford Escort for speeding and, at first glance, was
amazed to see how ugly the whole family of passengers
appeared to be. Then he took a second look and was surprised
to discover "the family" was actually fourteen pregnant
goats wearing T-shirts. Driver John Ofosu admitted stealing
the animals from villages in the Ashanti region.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, June 4, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#378)
THESE COWS WOULD NEED PASSPORTS
When villagers in
Turalei, Sudan, were interviewed in 1989, they had no idea
one of their own, pro basketball player Manute Bol, was
famous in America. But they sent a message: "If Manute is
still alive, tell him his wife has married another and most
of his cattle were stolen. But if he has no cows and wants
to marry an American woman, we can get the cows together for
him. Just let us know how many cows the woman's family
demands."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, June 5, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#379)
YOU CAN BET SHE GOT ALL
FLUSHED OVER THAT DECISION
The Virginia Supreme
Court upheld a $150,000 jury verdict to Martha J. Love for
back injuries sustained when she fell off a loose toilet
seat in a Richmond office building.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, June 6, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#380)
RIDES? BET ALLIGATORS
LOVE TO GIVE RIDES, SLURP!
The Georgia State Gaming
Commission had spent a goodly amount of time arguing pro and
con on what regulations were needed for alligator rides,
when they realized a tiny typing error had created
"alligator rides" instead of "alligator hides".
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, June 7, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#381)
PERHAPS HE CAN JUST
CHANGE OVER TO THE BANJO?
Cellist Augustinas
Vassiliauskas of the Soviet Vilnius string quartet was
climbing back to the podium for the third round of applause
at the 1980 Kuhmo Music Festival when he tripped and fell on
his prized Ruggieri cello, breaking the 300-year-old
instrument beyond repair.
Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, June 8, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#382)
HE COULDN'T THUMB HIS
NOSE AT THOSE RULES, OR ANYTHING
The Supreme Court upheld
a ruling that cut off disability benefits to Paul E.
Spragens of Wyoming. With no use of either arm, and limited
use of his legs, Mr. Spragens was earning $349.26 a month as
a book indexer by typing with his toes, but Federal rules
limited his disabled earnings to no more than $300 a month.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, June 9, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#383)
THEY CLIMBED THE RUNGS
TO MAKE THEIR RUN
Several inmates escaped
from a prison near Aix-en-Province, France, by climbing over
the wall on ladders left behind by workers installing wire
on top of the walls... to stop escapes.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, June 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#384)
THESE OWNERS WANTED THE
JOB DONE RIGHT
General Motors notified
Buick LeSabre owners their cars' instruction books contained
an error, and attached a corrected manual with these
instructions for proper use: "Please place the (new) owner's
manual in your vehicle's glove box and discard the old
manual. Or, take the new manual to your dealership and it
will be installed free". A Chicago Buick dealer said he had
two owners bring in their new books for installation.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, June 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#385)
THIS GUY WAS TRYING HARD
TO CLEAN UP HIS ACT
A Houston man was fined
$10,000 and placed on ten years probation for stealing
nearly 80,000 rolls of toilet paper from the Jefferson Davis
Hospital.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, June 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#386)
HE SUFFERED FROM A GENERAL-RUN-DOWN FEELING
Irishman Bob Finnegan, 22, was crossing a Belfast street in 1976, when struck by a taxi. Before he could get up
off the street, he was hit by another car, knocking him into the gutter. As a crowd gathered, a small van plowed into the crowd,
injuring three, and hitting Finnegan again. When a fourth vehicle headed for the crowd, all scattered, allowing the vehicle to run over
Finnegan again. (In two minutes Finnegan suffered a fractured skull, broken pelvis, broken leg, and other injuries. Hospital officials
did said he would recover.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#387)
WHY NOT NEEDLES AND
THREAD TO SEW THEIR MOUTHS, ALSO?
People living near Hong
Kong stadium objected to a planned rock concert because of
the noise. To please both the fans and the neighbors, the
promoters handed out more than 17,500 pairs of gloves to
those attending the concert... to muffle their applause.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#388)
HE HAD ABOUT ALL THE
CRAP HE COULD TAKE
A man using an outhouse
near Lawrence, Kansas, lost his footing while trying to
retrieve his wallet, and fell through the toilet seat into
the storage pit below. He was stuck there for seven hours in
three foot deep human waste before being rescued. Douglas
County Sheriff Loren Anderson said the man was unhurt "but
in a pretty bad mood".
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#389)
WONDER IF THE BAILIFF
AND COURT REPORTER GOT IN ON THE FUN?
Convicted of murder in
Mendocino, California, Thomas Marston argued in his appeal
that conflict of interest had caused the conviction. To
support his case, Marston submitted evidence his attorney
had fathered the child of the female district attorney, who,
in return, was hassling his attorney, the father, for child
support. And a witness told the appeals court the mother
told her the father of her child was not the lawyer, but the
judge in the case.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, June 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#390)
OTHER THAN THAT, HOW WAS
THEIR FLIGHT?
A small plane
crash-landed at Toledo's Express Airport in Ohio in 1984.
But not even the control tower noticed for half an hour.
That's when one of the three occupants of the little plane
was able to drag himself to the main terminal and ask
Express employees for help. (Take a number buddy. We'll be
right with you.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, June 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#391)
THEY SHOULD'VE PRACTICED
IN THEIR ROOMS ON THEMSELVES FIRST
Two men with pistols
fired a total of twelve shots at each other, within only a
few feet of each other, in the hallway of their Cleveland,
Ohio, apartment. But no one was injured. Police speculated
the men, age 76 and 77, missed because one had glaucoma and
the other had to prop himself up with a cane each time
before firing.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, June 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#392)
TOO BAD HE WASN'T STANDING BEHIND ONE
John Sedgwick
What was the last thing Union Major General John Joseph Segewick said in May 1864, at the Battle of
Spotsylvania Court House? "They couldn't hit an elephant at this distan....."
Andrew J. Hewett
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broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, June 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#393)
COST THIS DRUNK ONE YEAR
IN JAIL AND $100 PER DEATH
A court in Anahuac, Texas,
sentenced a 60-year-old man to five years in prison and a $500 fine
for being intoxicated during an accident involving 25 vehicles and
killing five people. He had 18 previous drunk driving convictions.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#394)
THERE'S SOMETHING
CROOKED GOING ON HERE
In 1987, players for the
Stroitel Cheropovets soccer club, in the old Soviet Union,
reported their manager for corruption. They accused him of
keeping the money they had given him to bribe referees.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#395)
TRUE LOVE IN A PRIMATE
A female monkey in the
city of Kanpur, India, jumped onto a high-tension power wire
and electrocuted herself, causing a city blackout for
several hours. Ten days earlier, her mate had died when he
jumped on the same wire and also blacked out the city. The
United News of India reported the female had visited the
site of her mate's death daily until she jumped to her own
death.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#396)
THAT'S WHY IT'S CALLED
"MONKEYING AROUND"
In 1985 British zoos
stopped training chimpanzees to mimic humans at tea parties,
which they had been doing for years to entertain visitors.
Researchers said the chimps were losing their own identities
so completely they had given up sex, and the zoos were
running low on their kind. (No sex, please! We're
British.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, June 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#397)
NOT A GOOD WAY TO "CUT
THROUGH TRAFFIC"
Even though Kenneth
Worles' drivers license had been suspended six times, he
didn't let that stand in his way. Naples Florida police
arrested him again for drunk driving, when he ran a red
light at a busy intersection, riding his ten-horsepower lawn
mower.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#398)
THESE SUPPORTERS WANTED
CHECKS FOR ATHLETIC SUPPORTERS
The Dallas Morning News reported the fathers of two girls playing on a
soccer team in Denton, Texas, became angry because their
team was losing badly, and demanded the gender of two of the
other team's players (age 10) be physically examined. (The
fathers were suspended as spectators for the rest of the
season.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, June 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#399)
THESE TRAINS GIVE THEM TRANSFERS TO HEAVEN
Andy Warhol
The most popular suicide location in
Caracas, Venezuela, is beneath the city where all underground trains must pass.
The favorite time of day to die is during rush hour, when it is possible for a
desperate soul to spread-eagle across enough tracks to shut down the entire
transit system for about one minute. (Andy Warhol, what about these folks' other
fourteen minutes?)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, June 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#400)
WATCH WHO YOU HANG OUT
WITH (OR ARE CONNECTED TO)
Judge Juan Flores sentenced Jose
Lopez of Villarrica, Paraguay, to die for first degree murder with a
shotgun, even though it meant his Siamese twin brother Alfredo,
joined at his side, would also die for the crime he tried to stop
his brother from committing.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#401)
THAT'S GREAT. THEY'LL BE
ABLE TO GO OUT FOR PIZZA
When officials in
Wellington, New Zealand, applied for a permit to build a new
jail, the city's new building code required all persons
(which automatically included prisoners) to have access to
an exit in case of fire. "Which means if you put a prisoner
behind bars," Regional Commander Murry Jackson said, "you
have to give them the key to get out."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#402)
WHY NOT?
From Ohio: Noting the Toledo Express Airport was buying homes near its runways because the jet noise exceeded
government standards, Mayor Carty Finkbelner suggested the homes be sold at a discount to the hearing impaired.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, June 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#403)
FINAL SCORE: GOLDFARB-0 GOD-1
Jason Goldfarb, 17, a junior at Nashoba Regional High School in Massachusetts, climbed to the top of a goal post
on the school's football field, and placed a wreath in memory of two classmates killed two days earlier in a car wreck. As Goldfarb
placed the memorial, and looked skyward in prayer, the five-hundred-pound goal post fell forward, crushing him to death.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, June 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#404)
STINKING BILL COLLECTORS
A London bill collection
agency, Smelly Tramps, LTD., sends out foul smelling bums to
sit in the offices of those with unpaid bills. The stinky
chemicals they wear on their bodies makes the air virtually
unbreathable in only a few minutes. They also advertise a
successful collection rate of around 90%.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, July 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#405)
POOR BABY......OR FOOD
FOR THE AQUARIUMS' FISH?
A baby whale beached
during a storm near the Marineland Aquarium, in Mystic,
Connecticut, received both heart massage and
mouth-to-blowhole resuscitation by the aquarium staff, but
still died.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, July 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#406)
LET'S HOPE THEY NEVER
LOSE THOSE FISHING POLES AT GUNPOINT
In Kennesaw, Georgia,
north of Atlanta, a 1982 ordinance requires all able-bodied
residents to have a gun and ammunition. The city council of
the neighboring town, Acworth, Georgia, responded by passing
an ordinance requiring all households to own fishing poles.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, July 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#407)
DUH!
During the first year of operation on
the 164-mile expressway between Beijing and Shijiazhuang, 404 people were killed
and 1,028 were injured in traffic accidents. Authorities blamed the high
fatality rate on a middle lane that allows cars to pass in both directions,
causing many head-on collisions.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#408)
THEY HAVE KEYSTONE COPS IN THE UK, TOO
Nine British police
officers in Coventry, England, squeezed into an elevator
made for eight, causing it to stall between floors. A
resident of the building, Eddie Laidle, heard their shouts
for help and hollered to them he would call police. To that
they shouted back, "We are the bloody police! Call the fire
brigade!!!"
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006 - On Vacation
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, July 06, 2006 - On Vacation
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, July 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#409)
DID YOU PARTY ANIMALS OVERLOOK THIS
SALE?
Steve Blow's column in the Dallas
Morning News February 6, 2004, told his readers of a "ponzi scheme"
which, after collapsing, left 73,000 liters of cheap corn vodka and 7
million condoms in a Panama warehouse with no buyers.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, July 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#410)
THEY SHOULD'VE FED-EXED THEIR NEW
ITINERARY
The German Federal Prosecutors' office
received, on March 3rd, a letter, dated March 2nd, from the Red Army
terrorists group taking responsibility for the March 3rd assassination of
Agriculture Minister Ignaz Kiechle. On March 4th, that same office received
another letter, dated March 3rd, explaining the "hit" letter had been mailed
just before the assassination was called off. They had made a mistake.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, July 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#411)
YUM YUM, BOO HOO, YUM YUM, BOO HOO, YUM
YUM.............
Stockholm's Skansen Park Zoo was forced
to cut back on its number of bear cubs because of severe overcrowding. A
2-year-old cub named Molly was selected, pulled from her den, beaten to
death, then cleaned and cooked for the staff to eat. One employee declined
the meal, saying, "Molly was so nice, I couldn't take a bite."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, July 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#412)
THEY PROBABLY DIDN'T GIVE 2-FOR-1
OFFERS?
Charles Rogers, 67, of Drapestown,
North Ireland, was watching his brother's grave being dug when the sides
began caving in. Reaching down to help the gravedigger, Rogers lost his
balance and fell to the bottom. The headstone immediately followed, crushing
him to death.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#413)
ALL SIMPLY BECAUSE LAWYERS MAKE LAWS
The 23 lawyers who formed Rodney King's
(He was the object of Los Angeles' riots on April 29, 1992) legal team
submitted a bill to the city of Los Angeles for $4.4 million, over half a
million more than Rodney King got himself, $3.8 million. "All I ask is a
day's wages for a day's work," said Steven A. Lerman, one of King's
attorneys.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#414)
CHEAP KITCHENWARE AND FREE FURNITURE,
WOW!
At one time the Kuwait's Charity
Committee for the Marriage Project tried urging married men to take more
wives (Islamic law allows up to four). Hoping to lower the number of
spinster women in that country, the committee was willing to give each
multi-husband wedding gifts of: a loan (equivalent to $2,800); cheap
kitchenware; and free furniture.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, July 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#415)
HIS HEAVY FOOT GOT EXPENSIVE
When police in Edmonton, Alberta,
Canada, pulled over a motorist, he immediately jumped from his car and threw
his radar detector to the pavement. Then, while jumping up and down on it,
he raged, "I paid $500 for this damned detector and it doesn't work!" Police
then explained they had stopped him for not having a front license plate.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, July 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#416)
JUST HOW GOOD WAS THEIR
BEHAVIOR?
After admitting he "made a serious
judgment error," the administrator of Montana's Corrections Division
resigned. As a reward "for good behavior," he had taken three female
prisoners, one serving a life sentence for murder, to a Billings restaurant
for dinner.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, July 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#417)
I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE, UH....CHILI
OF AMERICA?
In Potter County, Texas, the national
flag of Chili flew over the courthouse a full day before Assistant District
Attorney Paul Hermann asked why. He was told the manufacturer had
accidentally sent the like-colored Chilean flag, and the flag-raiser didn't
notice the difference.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, July 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#418)
THEY SHOULD'VE SAID INSIDE A KNEE-DEEP
CITY SEWAGE TANK
More than 500 people mobbed the Ft.
Worth Texas Central Library, throwing books from the shelves, all because
local radio station KYNG-FM claimed they'd hidden $5 and $10 bills between
the pages of the books there. This assault of people knocked books from the
shelves, leaving many with ripped spines and torn pages. The station
apologized, saying they had only tried to give added inspiration to National
Library Month.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, July 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#419)
PERHAPS HE ONCE SAW A SHIRT WITH A BULL
ON IT?
A Washington, D.C., man was indicted by
a federal grand jury on charges of committing five bank robberies. A common
link in three of the robberies were notes asking for the money, then ending
with the word "bullshirt."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#420)
ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF FIFTEEN MINUTES OF
FAME
When Yitzhak Krasiltchik left the
Soviet Union for migration to Israel and landed at Ben Gurion Airport in
Jerusalem, he became the 100,000th immigrant. The 87-year-old man and his
family were then whisked off the runway in a limousine to a "welcome party"
at the airport lounge. Later, after the party was over, and all the
dignitaries and well-wishers had left, the Krasiltchiks discovered they had
missed the bus to their new home in the Negev Desert. Then they realized
they were the only ones left at the airport, had no way to leave, and no
place to stay.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#421)
WELL, THIS BEATS A MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE
Fortune magazine reported, in
1988, some employees of Merrill Lynch's New York office had such poor
interoffice mail service they actually found it faster to send their
in-house mail via Federal Express.
Fortune reported, "Memos were whisked from floor to floor via Memphis,
Tennessee."
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, July 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#422)
A SPLEEN THAT BECAME A CASH COW
The California Supreme Court ruled
cancer patient John Moore was entitled to profit from his enlarged,
cancerous spleen, which had been removed by surgeons. After the operation,
doctors used the spleen to develop anticancer drugs, and Moore wanted part
of the profits, estimated to be around $3 billion. (The amount won was to be
determined.)
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, July 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#423)
HOW ABOUT A ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR ONE
WHO CAN'T?
In Narooma, Australia, 16-year-old
Gregory Hammond, who was born with only one hand, finished second in a men's
100-meter swim race. That is until officials checked their international
rules book. They then declared he had not won any place in the race because
the rules firmly state participants must touch the ends of the pool with
both hands.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, July 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#424)
GOOD THING. IF HE'D CROSSED HIS EYES HE
MIGHT'VE GONE BLIND
Baseball player Jamie Allen, whose
professional career was riddled with injuries, was out of action again at
the Seattle Mariners' 2004 spring camp, after crossing his legs while
watching television, pulling a groin muscle.
Andrew J. Hewett
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published,
broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, July 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#425)
THEY TEACH SPORTSMANSHIP AND BIGOTRY TO
CHILDREN
Little League Inc. of Williamsport,
Pennsylvania, refused to sanction a league for disabled youngsters in
Boston, Massachusetts. It also threatened to revoke the charter of that
city's Little League unless they severed all ties with the teams that
carried players with Down's Syndrome and multiple sclerosis.