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Copyright ©2006-2010 Andrew J. Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, May 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#344)
 
DON'T FORGET TO CHEW THE WATER
 
The Indian government releases thousands of scavenger turtles into the Ganges River each year to help it recycle thousands of decomposing human bodies thrown into it each year. Whole corpses, along with partially cremated bodies, are traditionally thrown into this river by Hindus who believe the water has Holy properties. (Third class families, of which there are millions, usually can not afford to buy enough wood to properly cremate their loved ones. So, symbolically, they burn what they can, then throw the rest into the river.)

Andrew J. Hewett
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Tuesday, May 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#345)
 
HE SAID A MOUTHFUL ADMITTING HE WANTED A HANDFUL
 
The Dallas grocery chain Minyard's pulled the November 1993 issue of Discovery magazine because the cover photo showed a sculpture of two apes with their genitals exposed. "When it shows the genitals or the breasts," Minyard's president Jay L. Williams said, "We're going to pull it." (Let's hope his hands were soft, too.)

Andrew J. Hewett
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Wednesday, May 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#346)
 
THE ALBATROSS FOR ALL TAXPAYERS: POLITICAL EGO
 
During a visit to Denver, by then Vice President Al Gore (1993-2001), Hamlet Barry III, chief of that City's water department, decided the South Platte River looked too shallow to serve as a backdrop for Gore's riverfront photo opportunity, so he raised the water level by releasing 96 millions gallons. The Rocky Mountain News reported the water's value at $59,000, which would have supplied nearly 300 families for a year.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, May 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#347)
 
WELL, AT LEAST HIS APARTMENT STAYED CLEAN
 
Jermund Skogstad, 50, of Oslo, Norway, moved into his new apartment, then immediately left to shop for food. Unfortunately, he forgot his wallet, which had his new address inside, and soon he realized he could not find his way back to his new apartment. "How embarrassing," he told a local newspaper a month later, hoping his new landlady, to whom he had paid a months rent in advance, might read his story in the paper.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Friday, May 05, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#348)
 
BUT HOW? SHE/HE'S NOT EQUIPPED WITH SNAP-ON TOOLS
 
Dr. Janis Ashley told a Sedalia, Missouri, newspaper she would soon have a sex-change operation so she could find a wife and raise a family. She had been a woman for 11 years, following her first sex-change operation.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Saturday, May 06, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#349)
 
MICKEY MOUSE AND DONALD DUCK EXPOSED!
 
After visiting Disneyland, Billy Jean Matey filed a lawsuit in Orange County, California, claiming she and her grandchildren suffered from negligence and emotional distress inflicted on them because they caught a glimpse of Disney characters taking off their costumes, "exposing the children to the reality of the fact that the characters are only make believe."

Andrew J. Hewett
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Sunday, May 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#350)
 
HE TRIED BEATING THE LAW BY BEATING HIS ATTORNEYS
 
When a court in Stockholm, Sweden, barred John Asonius, 41, from taping his trial, he took his recorder and beat the heads of both his court appointed defense attorneys. After guards were able to subdue the defendant, and his attorneys were able to stop bleeding and receive medical treatment, his trial began again, with his attorneys sitting at a respectful distance.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Monday, May 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#351)
 
A LITTLE EXTRA SHAKING GOING ON BESIDES THAT EARTHQUAKE
 
When U.S. corporations sent relief supplies to India's Maharashtra state after the 1993 earthquake, items included were dental floss, contact lens cleaner and lubricants for sexual intimacy.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Tuesday, May 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#352)
 
PERHAPS HE HIMSELF SUFFERED FROM "ALL IN THE FAMILY"
 
A state representative from Louisiana, Carl Gunter, opposed an exception to an anti-abortion bill for victims of incest, saying "Inbreeding is how we get championship horses."

Andrew J. Hewett
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Wednesday, May 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#353)
 
WE THE PEOPLE, FOR THE PEOPLE.............NOT
 
The U.S. Government announced in October 1994 it would reduce funding for food banks and other programs that fed Americans living below the poverty line by $55 million. The same day, the same U.S. Government announced it would spend $47 million to train Haiti's police force.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, May 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#354)
 
SOMEBODY CALL THE COPS!.... ON NO!... THEY IS THEM!
 
As many as one hundred New York Police officers, described by Police Commissioner William Bratton as "morons and nitwits," went on a drunken rampage at a downtown Washington, D.C., hotel. Witnesses said officers fired their weapons into the air, groped women, sprayed fire extinguishers, stripped naked and set off fire alarms. After a two month investigation, one officer resigned and twenty-nine were reprimanded for taking their guns out of state.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Friday, May 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#355)
 
TRY AND FIND SANE REASONING IN THIS
 
Just before Christmas 2003, ABC NEWS reported the Mexico City Police Department had announced it would not arrest drunk drivers on either Christmas Eve or New Year's Eve because "Most people are home on those two nights anyway."

Andrew J. Hewett
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Saturday, May 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#354)
 
IF ALIVE, THE JUDGE COULD'VE SENTENCED HIM TO A HALF-WAY HOUSE
 
Authorities found a body half-way through a basement window, in Williamsport, Pennsylvania. A would-be burglar, wearing a heavy coat and two sweaters against the severe cold, had become stuck squeezing through the 15" by 18" window.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Sunday, May 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#357)
 
NOR CAN HE PASS GO AND COLLECT $200
 
Jorge Rodriquez, 22, spoke no English and had no lawyer when he appeared in a Kenosha, Wisconsin, court on charges of drunk driving. But he still appeared cheerful and confident as he approached the judge and handed over a GET OUT OF JAIL FREE card, which that county sheriff's opponent in the upcoming election had printed thousands of.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Monday, May 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#358)
 
A PARTICULARLY PESKY PIECE OF PARANOIA
 
Several years before his overthrow, in December 1989, Romanian dictator Nicolae Ceaucescu (1918-1989) responded to critical letters written by Romanians to Radio Free Europe by ordering hand writing samples be taken of each and every Romanian citizen, meaning approximately 20 million samples would be required to satisfy his sick mind. (He didn't even have copies of the letters to compare.)

Andrew J. Hewett
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Tuesday, May 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#359)
 
HOLY BROWN MESS! HOPE NO ONE WAS INSIDE
 
Back in the late 1990s the U.S. Army tested an air-defense gun named "Sergeant York". It was designed to home-in on the whirling blades of helicopters and propeller-driven aircraft. Instead, it ignored the chopper targets and demolished a ventilating fan, as well as the outdoor toilet underneath.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Wednesday, May 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#360)
 
CARE TO GET DRUNK AND DONATE?
 
Dr. Maurice Nelligan, one of Ireland's leading heart surgeons, blamed the police for running such a successful campaign against drunk driving, it had caused a shortage of transplantable organs.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, May 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#361)
 
GOT A BAD MARRIAGE? EAT GARLIC
 
At the first International Workshop on Bad Breath, held in Tel Aviv, Shlomo Goren, a former chief rabbi of Israel, declared bad breath is a legitimate reason for divorce. He said several couples had been granted divorces because of halitosis.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Friday, May 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#362)
 
WONDER IF HE STOLE THE SHOW?
 
Gordon Benjamin was granted parole from a Shirley, Massachusetts, maximum-security state prison, but decided to remain behind bars for two more months in order to appear as Sir Lancelot in an inmate production of Camelot.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Saturday, May 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#363)
 
HE MUST'VE GIVEN THAT JUDGE A GOOD TIP?
 
In New Castle, Pennsylvania, Judge Ralph Pratt sentenced Albert Mangino to 30 days behind bars for drunk driving. His Honor then completed the sentencing by giving Mr. Mangino work release status so he could leave jail each day and go to his usual work, betting on horses at West Virginia racetracks.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Sunday, May 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#364)
 
THEY WERE PLEASED THEIR CAR WAS STOLEN
 
When Dallas police told Charlie and Sharon Reed their banana-yellow 1978 Volkswagen convertible had been recovered they were very happy. And they were even happier when they inspected their vehicle at the police pound. Before its theft, their little car had a cracked windshield and a smashed rear end. Now it had a new windshield, new bumper, new fenders and a paint job.......and a full tank of gas.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Monday, May 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#365)
 
HE NEEDED A 'CLEAN' JAR FILLER
 
According to ABC's Paul Harvey News, a young man in Illinois named Copps was on probation for marijuana possession, and was required to take a urine test every 30 days. But, rather than give up the habit, he obtained his urine sample from his cousin. Unfortunately, that urine sample proved the probationer had changed over from smoking pot to using cocaine.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Tuesday, May 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#366)
 
THIS MENTALITY: FROM FATHER AND BROTHER ONE AND THE SAME?
 
While the world moved forward in the 1960s, in Gaston County, North Carolina, a group of parents were demanding all maps used in classrooms have both Germany and "all" African countries removed because they said those countries were all "antichristian." These parents also demanded the Greek alphabet not be taught because the Greeks endorsed homosexuality.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Wednesday, May 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#367)
 
PICTURE THIS HAPPENING TO YOU
 
A tour operator was sued by a German couple who had taken a Caribbean cruise to enjoy Calypso music they were never able to hear. That's because most of the other 600 passengers on board were members of the Swiss Union of Friends of Folk Music. According to the lawsuit, most of the 600 yodeled day and night for the entire 14-days-and-and-nights at sea. A Frankfurt District Court ordered a refund of one-third of the couples $4,478 fare.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, May 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#368)
 
HE WAS ANXIOUS TO WRITE A LONG NOVEL, NO DOUBT
 
A stroke victim hospitalized in a Berkeley, California, could only communicate with his eyes, one blink meaning "yes" and two blinks meaning "no", until a local group raised $4,000 to purchase a special computer so he could write sentences with only the slightest touch of his finger. Once everything was installed, and the silent man could express his most needed need, he typed 21 letters and three spaces, which read, "PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE!!!"

Andrew J. Hewett
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Friday, May 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#369)
 
"HIS EYES HAVE SEEN THE GLORY OF THE......"
 
Guatemalan President Jorge Serrano Elias defended himself against television footage showing the born-again Christian leaving a New York City topless club, by blaming leftist guerrilla "manipulation" of the video tape.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Saturday, May 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#370)
 
WHY? THOSE NUMBERS DIDN'T BRING HIM ANY LUCK
 
The New York State Lottery had to suspend the numbers 3569 by noon on December 27, 1989, because too many people had selected those numbers. Why? New York Yankees' manager Billy Martin had been killed a few days before in an accident, and the license plate number on the truck was VR3569.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Sunday, May 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#371)
 
STICKS HIT BALLS, MEN GET RICH
 
In January 2004, Larry Powell, columnist for The Dallas Morning News, quoted from that paper's archives in 1966, "Single-season homer king and two-time American League MVP Roger Maris, 31, agrees to a $70,000-a-year contract with the New York Yankees." In that same 2004 newspaper, the Associated Press reported, "Two-time American League MVP former Ranger Juan Gonzalez agreed Tuesday to a one-year contract with the Kansas City Royals that guarantees him $4.5 million."

Andrew J. Hewett
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Monday, May 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#372)
 
GUESS THEY DON'T KEEP UP WITH "THE COLONIES" MUCH?
 
According to ABC's Paul Harvey News, when a musical about a U.S. city opened in London, 65% of people questioned there had no idea which city it was about, even though the title of the production was CHICAGO.

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Tuesday, May 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#373)
 
A MODERN MUMMY MAYBE?
 
Police in the state of Washington labeled the death of Christian Agar, 27, "suspicious" after his body was found along side U.S. Highway 101 covered entirely from head-to-toe in duct tape. (Perhaps he committed suicide?)

Andrew J. Hewett
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Wednesday, May 31, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#374)
 
FLUFFY GOT FLATTENED
 
A Berlin Heights, Ohio, couple sued a local pizza company for $125,000, saying a bad pizza had caused the death of their dog. The suit claimed a pizza they tried to eat was so rotten and moldy, it made them ill. Therefore, it was the pizza company's fault, when they backed out rushing to a hospital, and backed over their poor dog Fluffy. (Fluffy wasn't fluffy anymore.)

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, June 1, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#375)
 
GETTING "PERKS" IN PRISON
 
The Dayton, Ohio, Daily News reported the Pentagon was providing salaries and benefits for 680 military personnel behind bars for such crimes as murder, rape and child molestation. This error alone cost taxpayers more than $1 million a month. (Someone once wrote, people will get as much government as they are willing to tolerate.)

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Friday, June 2, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#376)
 
PICTURE OWLS WEARING BARF BAGS
 
Some years ago the Illinois state legislature gave the Department of Conservation $180,000 to create a program to study the contents of owl vomit, to determine what foods owls ate during different seasons. (But don't they eat bugs and mice in spring, bugs and mice in summer, bugs and mice in fall, bugs and mice in winter?)

Andrew J. Hewett
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Saturday, June 3, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#377)
 
THEY NEEDED MATERNITY TOPS, NOT T-SHIRTS
 
Ghanaian police officer Mustapha Garbah testified in an Accra court that he pulled over a Ford Escort for speeding and, at first glance, was amazed to see how ugly the whole family of passengers appeared to be. Then he took a second look and was surprised to discover "the family" was actually fourteen pregnant goats wearing T-shirts. Driver John Ofosu admitted stealing the animals from villages in the Ashanti region.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Sunday, June 4, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#378)
 
THESE COWS WOULD NEED PASSPORTS
 
When villagers in Turalei, Sudan, were interviewed in 1989, they had no idea one of their own, pro basketball player Manute Bol, was famous in America. But they sent a message: "If Manute is still alive, tell him his wife has married another and most of his cattle were stolen. But if he has no cows and wants to marry an American woman, we can get the cows together for him. Just let us know how many cows the woman's family demands."

Andrew J. Hewett
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Monday, June 5, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#379)
 
YOU CAN BET SHE GOT ALL FLUSHED OVER THAT DECISION
 
The Virginia Supreme Court upheld a $150,000 jury verdict to Martha J. Love for back injuries sustained when she fell off a loose toilet seat in a Richmond office building.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Tuesday, June 6, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#380)
 
RIDES? BET ALLIGATORS LOVE TO GIVE RIDES, SLURP!
 
The Georgia State Gaming Commission had spent a goodly amount of time arguing pro and con on what regulations were needed for alligator rides, when they realized a tiny typing error had created "alligator rides" instead of "alligator hides".

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Wednesday, June 7, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#381)
 
PERHAPS HE CAN JUST CHANGE OVER TO THE BANJO?
 
Cellist Augustinas Vassiliauskas of the Soviet Vilnius string quartet was climbing back to the podium for the third round of applause at the 1980 Kuhmo Music Festival when he tripped and fell on his prized Ruggieri cello, breaking the 300-year-old instrument beyond repair.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, June 8, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#382)
 
HE COULDN'T THUMB HIS NOSE AT THOSE RULES, OR ANYTHING
 
The Supreme Court upheld a ruling that cut off disability benefits to Paul E. Spragens of Wyoming. With no use of either arm, and limited use of his legs, Mr. Spragens was earning $349.26 a month as a book indexer by typing with his toes, but Federal rules limited his disabled earnings to no more than $300 a month.

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Friday, June 9, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#383)
 
THEY CLIMBED THE RUNGS TO MAKE THEIR RUN
 
Several inmates escaped from a prison near Aix-en-Province, France, by climbing over the wall on ladders left behind by workers installing wire on top of the walls... to stop escapes.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Saturday, June 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#384)
 
THESE OWNERS WANTED THE JOB DONE RIGHT
 
General Motors notified Buick LeSabre owners their cars' instruction books contained an error, and attached a corrected manual with these instructions for proper use: "Please place the (new) owner's manual in your vehicle's glove box and discard the old manual. Or, take the new manual to your dealership and it will be installed free". A Chicago Buick dealer said he had two owners bring in their new books for installation.

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Sunday, June 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#385)
 
THIS GUY WAS TRYING HARD TO CLEAN UP HIS ACT
 
A Houston man was fined $10,000 and placed on ten years probation for stealing nearly 80,000 rolls of toilet paper from the Jefferson Davis Hospital.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Monday, June 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#386)
 
HE SUFFERED FROM A GENERAL-RUN-DOWN FEELING
 
Irishman Bob Finnegan, 22, was crossing a Belfast street in 1976, when struck by a taxi. Before he could get up off the street, he was hit by another car, knocking him into the gutter. As a crowd gathered, a small van plowed into the crowd, injuring three, and hitting Finnegan again. When a fourth vehicle headed for the crowd, all scattered, allowing the vehicle to run over Finnegan again. (In two minutes Finnegan suffered a fractured skull, broken pelvis, broken leg, and other injuries. Hospital officials did said he would recover.)

Andrew J. Hewett
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Tuesday, June 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#387)
 
WHY NOT NEEDLES AND THREAD TO SEW THEIR MOUTHS, ALSO?
 
People living near Hong Kong stadium objected to a planned rock concert because of the noise. To please both the fans and the neighbors, the promoters handed out more than 17,500 pairs of gloves to those attending the concert... to muffle their applause.

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Wednesday, June 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#388)
 
HE HAD ABOUT ALL THE CRAP HE COULD TAKE
 
A man using an outhouse near Lawrence, Kansas, lost his footing while trying to retrieve his wallet, and fell through the toilet seat into the storage pit below. He was stuck there for seven hours in three foot deep human waste before being rescued. Douglas County Sheriff Loren Anderson said the man was unhurt "but in a pretty bad mood".

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Thursday, June 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#389)
 
WONDER IF THE BAILIFF AND COURT REPORTER GOT IN ON THE FUN?
 
Convicted of murder in Mendocino, California, Thomas Marston argued in his appeal that conflict of interest had caused the conviction. To support his case, Marston submitted evidence his attorney had fathered the child of the female district attorney, who, in return, was hassling his attorney, the father, for child support. And a witness told the appeals court the mother told her the father of her child was not the lawyer, but the judge in the case.

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Friday, June 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#390)
 
OTHER THAN THAT, HOW WAS THEIR FLIGHT?
 
A small plane crash-landed at Toledo's Express Airport in Ohio in 1984. But not even the control tower noticed for half an hour. That's when one of the three occupants of the little plane was able to drag himself to the main terminal and ask Express employees for help. (Take a number buddy. We'll be right with you.)

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Saturday, June 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#391)
 
THEY SHOULD'VE PRACTICED IN THEIR ROOMS ON THEMSELVES FIRST
 
Two men with pistols fired a total of twelve shots at each other, within only a few feet of each other, in the hallway of their Cleveland, Ohio, apartment. But no one was injured. Police speculated the men, age 76 and 77, missed because one had glaucoma and the other had to prop himself up with a cane each time before firing.

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Sunday, June 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#392)
 
TOO BAD HE WASN'T STANDING BEHIND ONE
 
John Sedgwick

      John Sedgwick

What was the last thing Union Major General John Joseph Segewick said in May 1864, at the Battle of Spotsylvania Court House? "They couldn't hit an elephant at this distan....."

 
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Monday, June 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#393)
 
COST THIS DRUNK ONE YEAR IN JAIL AND $100 PER DEATH
 
A court in Anahuac, Texas, sentenced a 60-year-old man to five years in prison and a $500 fine for being intoxicated during an accident involving 25 vehicles and killing five people. He had 18 previous drunk driving convictions.

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Tuesday, June 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#394)
 
THERE'S SOMETHING CROOKED GOING ON HERE
 
In 1987, players for the Stroitel Cheropovets soccer club, in the old Soviet Union, reported their manager for corruption. They accused him of keeping the money they had given him to bribe referees.

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Wednesday, June 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#395)
 
TRUE LOVE IN A PRIMATE
 
A female monkey in the city of Kanpur, India, jumped onto a high-tension power wire and electrocuted herself, causing a city blackout for several hours. Ten days earlier, her mate had died when he jumped on the same wire and also blacked out the city. The United News of India reported the female had visited the site of her mate's death daily until she jumped to her own death.

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Thursday, June 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#396)
 
THAT'S WHY IT'S CALLED "MONKEYING AROUND"
 
In 1985 British zoos stopped training chimpanzees to mimic humans at tea parties, which they had been doing for years to entertain visitors. Researchers said the chimps were losing their own identities so completely they had given up sex, and the zoos were running low on their kind. (No sex, please! We're British.)

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Friday, June 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#397)
 
NOT A GOOD WAY TO "CUT THROUGH TRAFFIC"
 
Even though Kenneth Worles' drivers license had been suspended six times, he didn't let that stand in his way. Naples Florida police arrested him again for drunk driving, when he ran a red light at a busy intersection, riding his ten-horsepower lawn mower.

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Saturday, June 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#398)
 
THESE SUPPORTERS WANTED CHECKS FOR ATHLETIC SUPPORTERS
 
The Dallas Morning News reported the fathers of two girls playing on a soccer team in Denton, Texas, became angry because their team was losing badly, and demanded the gender of two of the other team's players (age 10) be physically examined. (The fathers were suspended as spectators for the rest of the season.)

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Sunday, June 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#399)
 
THESE TRAINS GIVE THEM TRANSFERS TO HEAVEN
 
Picture of Andy Warhol

Andy Warhol

The most popular suicide location in Caracas, Venezuela, is beneath the city where all underground trains must pass. The favorite time of day to die is during rush hour, when it is possible for a desperate soul to spread-eagle across enough tracks to shut down the entire transit system for about one minute. (Andy Warhol, what about these folks' other fourteen minutes?)



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Monday, June 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#400)
 
WATCH WHO YOU HANG OUT WITH (OR ARE CONNECTED TO)
 
Judge Juan Flores sentenced Jose Lopez of Villarrica, Paraguay, to die for first degree murder with a shotgun, even though it meant his Siamese twin brother Alfredo, joined at his side, would also die for the crime he tried to stop his brother from committing.

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Tuesday, June 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#401)
 
THAT'S GREAT. THEY'LL BE ABLE TO GO OUT FOR PIZZA
 
When officials in Wellington, New Zealand, applied for a permit to build a new jail, the city's new building code required all persons (which automatically included prisoners) to have access to an exit in case of fire. "Which means if you put a prisoner behind bars," Regional Commander Murry Jackson said, "you have to give them the key to get out."

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Wednesday, June 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#402)
 
WHY NOT?
 
From Ohio: Noting the Toledo Express Airport was buying homes near its runways because the jet noise exceeded government standards, Mayor Carty Finkbelner suggested the homes be sold at a discount to the hearing impaired.

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Thursday, June 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#403)
 
FINAL SCORE: GOLDFARB-0 GOD-1
 
Jason Goldfarb, 17, a junior at Nashoba Regional High School in Massachusetts, climbed to the top of a goal post on the school's football field, and placed a wreath in memory of two classmates killed two days earlier in a car wreck. As Goldfarb placed the memorial, and looked skyward in prayer, the five-hundred-pound goal post fell forward, crushing him to death.

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Friday, June 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#404)
 
STINKING BILL COLLECTORS
 
A London bill collection agency, Smelly Tramps, LTD., sends out foul smelling bums to sit in the offices of those with unpaid bills. The stinky chemicals they wear on their bodies makes the air virtually unbreathable in only a few minutes. They also advertise a successful collection rate of around 90%.

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Saturday, July 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#405)
 
POOR BABY......OR FOOD FOR THE AQUARIUMS' FISH?
 
A baby whale beached during a storm near the Marineland Aquarium, in Mystic, Connecticut, received both heart massage and mouth-to-blowhole resuscitation by the aquarium staff, but still died.

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Sunday, July 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#406)
 
LET'S HOPE THEY NEVER LOSE THOSE FISHING POLES AT GUNPOINT
 
In Kennesaw, Georgia, north of Atlanta, a 1982 ordinance requires all able-bodied residents to have a gun and ammunition. The city council of the neighboring town, Acworth, Georgia, responded by passing an ordinance requiring all households to own fishing poles.

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Monday, July 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#407)
 
DUH!
 
Head-On Collision

During the first year of operation on the 164-mile expressway between Beijing and Shijiazhuang, 404 people were killed and 1,028 were injured in traffic accidents. Authorities blamed the high fatality rate on a middle lane that allows cars to pass in both directions, causing many head-on collisions.



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Tuesday, July 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#408)
 
THEY HAVE KEYSTONE COPS IN THE UK, TOO
 
Nine British police officers in Coventry, England, squeezed into an elevator made for eight, causing it to stall between floors. A resident of the building, Eddie Laidle, heard their shouts for help and hollered to them he would call police. To that they shouted back, "We are the bloody police! Call the fire brigade!!!"

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Wednesday, July 05, 2006 - On Vacation
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Thursday, July 06, 2006 - On Vacation
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Friday, July 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#409)
 
DID YOU PARTY ANIMALS OVERLOOK THIS SALE?
 
Steve Blow's column in the Dallas Morning News February 6, 2004, told his readers of a "ponzi scheme" which, after collapsing, left 73,000 liters of cheap corn vodka and 7 million condoms in a Panama warehouse with no buyers.

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Saturday, July 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#410)
 
THEY SHOULD'VE FED-EXED THEIR NEW ITINERARY
 
The German Federal Prosecutors' office received, on March 3rd, a letter, dated March 2nd, from the Red Army terrorists group taking responsibility for the March 3rd assassination of Agriculture Minister Ignaz Kiechle. On March 4th, that same office received another letter, dated March 3rd, explaining the "hit" letter had been mailed just before the assassination was called off. They had made a mistake.

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Sunday, July 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#411)
 
YUM YUM, BOO HOO, YUM YUM, BOO HOO, YUM YUM.............
 
Stockholm's Skansen Park Zoo was forced to cut back on its number of bear cubs because of severe overcrowding. A 2-year-old cub named Molly was selected, pulled from her den, beaten to death, then cleaned and cooked for the staff to eat. One employee declined the meal, saying, "Molly was so nice, I couldn't take a bite."

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Monday, July 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#412)
 
THEY PROBABLY DIDN'T GIVE 2-FOR-1 OFFERS?
 
Charles Rogers, 67, of Drapestown, North Ireland, was watching his brother's grave being dug when the sides began caving in. Reaching down to help the gravedigger, Rogers lost his balance and fell to the bottom. The headstone immediately followed, crushing him to death.

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Tuesday, July 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#413)
 
ALL SIMPLY BECAUSE LAWYERS MAKE LAWS
 
The 23 lawyers who formed Rodney King's (He was the object of Los Angeles' riots on April 29, 1992) legal team submitted a bill to the city of Los Angeles for $4.4 million, over half a million more than Rodney King got himself, $3.8 million. "All I ask is a day's wages for a day's work," said Steven A. Lerman, one of King's attorneys.

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Wednesday, July 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#414)
 
CHEAP KITCHENWARE AND FREE FURNITURE, WOW!
 
At one time the Kuwait's Charity Committee for the Marriage Project tried urging married men to take more wives (Islamic law allows up to four). Hoping to lower the number of spinster women in that country, the committee was willing to give each multi-husband wedding gifts of: a loan (equivalent to $2,800); cheap kitchenware; and free furniture.

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Thursday, July 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#415)
 
HIS HEAVY FOOT GOT EXPENSIVE
 
When police in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, pulled over a motorist, he immediately jumped from his car and threw his radar detector to the pavement. Then, while jumping up and down on it, he raged, "I paid $500 for this damned detector and it doesn't work!" Police then explained they had stopped him for not having a front license plate.

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Friday, July 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#416)
 
JUST HOW GOOD WAS THEIR BEHAVIOR?
 
After admitting he "made a serious judgment error," the administrator of Montana's Corrections Division resigned. As a reward "for good behavior," he had taken three female prisoners, one serving a life sentence for murder, to a Billings restaurant for dinner.

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Saturday, July 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#417)
 
I PLEDGE ALLEGIANCE TO THE, UH....CHILI OF AMERICA?
 
In Potter County, Texas, the national flag of Chili flew over the courthouse a full day before Assistant District Attorney Paul Hermann asked why. He was told the manufacturer had accidentally sent the like-colored Chilean flag, and the flag-raiser didn't notice the difference.

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Sunday, July 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#418)
 
THEY SHOULD'VE SAID INSIDE A KNEE-DEEP CITY SEWAGE TANK
 
More than 500 people mobbed the Ft. Worth Texas Central Library, throwing books from the shelves, all because local radio station KYNG-FM claimed they'd hidden $5 and $10 bills between the pages of the books there. This assault of people knocked books from the shelves, leaving many with ripped spines and torn pages. The station apologized, saying they had only tried to give added inspiration to National Library Month.

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Monday, July 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#419)
 
PERHAPS HE ONCE SAW A SHIRT WITH A BULL ON IT?
 
A Washington, D.C., man was indicted by a federal grand jury on charges of committing five bank robberies. A common link in three of the robberies were notes asking for the money, then ending with the word "bullshirt."

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Tuesday, July 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#420)
 
ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF FIFTEEN MINUTES OF FAME
 
When Yitzhak Krasiltchik left the Soviet Union for migration to Israel and landed at Ben Gurion Airport in Jerusalem, he became the 100,000th immigrant. The 87-year-old man and his family were then whisked off the runway in a limousine to a "welcome party" at the airport lounge. Later, after the party was over, and all the dignitaries and well-wishers had left, the Krasiltchiks discovered they had missed the bus to their new home in the Negev Desert. Then they realized they were the only ones left at the airport, had no way to leave, and no place to stay.

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Wednesday, July 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#421)
 
WELL, THIS BEATS A MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE
 
Fortune magazine reported, in 1988, some employees of Merrill Lynch's New York office had such poor interoffice mail service they actually found it faster to send their in-house mail via Federal Express. Fortune reported, "Memos were whisked from floor to floor via Memphis, Tennessee."

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Thursday, July 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#422)
 
A SPLEEN THAT BECAME A CASH COW
 
The California Supreme Court ruled cancer patient John Moore was entitled to profit from his enlarged, cancerous spleen, which had been removed by surgeons. After the operation, doctors used the spleen to develop anticancer drugs, and Moore wanted part of the profits, estimated to be around $3 billion. (The amount won was to be determined.)

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Friday, July 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#423)
 
HOW ABOUT A ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR ONE WHO CAN'T?
 
In Narooma, Australia, 16-year-old Gregory Hammond, who was born with only one hand, finished second in a men's 100-meter swim race. That is until officials checked their international rules book. They then declared he had not won any place in the race because the rules firmly state participants must touch the ends of the pool with both hands.

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Saturday, July 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#424)
 
GOOD THING. IF HE'D CROSSED HIS EYES HE MIGHT'VE GONE BLIND
 
Baseball player Jamie Allen, whose professional career was riddled with injuries, was out of action again at the Seattle Mariners' 2004 spring camp, after crossing his legs while watching television, pulling a groin muscle.

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Sunday, July 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#425)
 
THEY TEACH SPORTSMANSHIP AND BIGOTRY TO CHILDREN
 
Little League Inc. of Williamsport, Pennsylvania, refused to sanction a league for disabled youngsters in Boston, Massachusetts. It also threatened to revoke the charter of that city's Little League unless they severed all ties with the teams that carried players with Down's Syndrome and multiple sclerosis.

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Monday, July 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#426)
 
"ROBBING PETER TO PAY PAUL" WOULDN'T WORK HERE
 
After New York state lawmakers proposed making prison inmates pay state tax on all commissary purchases, officials pointed out although it would generate $520,000 yearly, hiring clerks for each of the state's 68 prisons would cost $1.5 million.

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Tuesday, July 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#427)
 
UNDERSTANDING, THE MOST BEAUTIFUL EXPRESSION OF LOVE
 
Withholding names out of respect, Paul Harvey on ABC Radio News, tells of an elderly man who went to collect his newspaper in the rain, but fell to the ground, unable to rise back to his feet. His aged wife, not able to get him back inside, wanted to call 911, but he stopped her, saying "No, this is the place." Knowingly, his wife went back inside, retrieved blankets to cover them both, then she lay down beside him in the rain for two, three, maybe four days? She didn't know. Time for her ceased to be. She only remembers holding him in her arms until he took his last breath.

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Wednesday, July 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#428)
 
WHO'S A NUT CASE? HE'S A NUT CASE
 
Dr. Oscar Dominguez, 45, a psychiatrist in Sao Paulo, Brazil, admitted he shot his patient to death while she told him about her sex life. He told the court, "I couldn't take those nut cases anymore."

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Thursday, July 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#429)
 
CAN'T BEAT THE SETTLEMENT HE TOOK FROM A BEATING
 
Walter Debow won a $3.4 million lawsuit against the city of East Louis, Illinois, for a wrongful beating he received in that city's jail. But since the city was bankrupt, instead of money he received the title to the city's main municipal building and its 220 acre industrial park.

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Friday, July 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#430)
 
HE JUST SLIPPED AWAY FROM HIS SHACKLES
 
Officials at the Hall Prison, outside Stockholm, Sweden, reported the escape of a skinny inmate who saved up all the margarine from his meals, until he had enough to cover himself and squeeze through the bars.

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Saturday, July 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#431)
 
IT BECAME A STRIPPED-DOWN MODEL, ACCIDENTALLY
 
Six Baltimore firefighters, defying a forty-year tradition of washing fire trucks by hand, took Aerial Tower 122, a forty-foot-long totally equipped, state-of-the-art fire engine through the washing system used for city busses. The truck got stuck and the cleaning brushes did $10,000 in damages, as it tore off hydraulic lines, knocked off equipment and damaged the basket used to lift firefighters.

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Sunday, July 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#432)
 
THAT'D BE 40,000 PENNIES IN GUM BALL CURRENCY
 
Gregory Ross, 25, of Portsmouth, Rhode Island, accused of robbing vending machines, posted his $400 bond with 1,600 quarters.

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Monday, July 31, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#433)
 
WAS HE TRYING TO ENSURE NO HITTING BELOW THE BELT?
 
According to Reader's Digest, when boxer Richard Proctor jumped into the ring at the World Sporting Club in London and removed his robe, it caused a round of thunderous applause from the fans. That's when Proctor realized he forgot to put on his boxing trunks.

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Tuesday, August 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#434)
 
HOME SHOPPING IN OTHERS' HOMES
 
Denise and Jeffrey Lagrimas of Oroville, California, were arrested in their home while holding a neighborhood watch meeting, after one neighbor spotted her stolen television set and realized Denise was wearing her stolen dress. Police officers, giving a presentation at the meeting, obtained a search warrant and found $9,000 worth of stolen goods.

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Wednesday, August 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#435)
 
NOTHING LIKE A NICE "HOT" MEAL
 
After Zambia received 2,800 cans of donated meat from Czechoslovakia, tests found it was radioactive, so authorities buried the entire shipment twenty feet underground, then covered it with a concrete slab. Not to be stopped, hungry Zambians used pick axes and any crude tools on hand to dig up the contaminated meat and eat it, every bit and gristle. Scavenger Mubita Sililo, speaking on behalf of his family, said, "(This meat) is the best we have had since we married."

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Thursday, August 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#436)
 
SOMEBODY NEEDS TO SEND HIM TO HIS ROOM FOR THAT
 
A 10-year-old Houston boy shot his father, Edward Simon, 45, dead and wounded his mother Mary Simon, 47, with a .38-caliber revolver because they would not let him go outside and play.

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Friday, August 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#437)
 
ISN'T EVERYONE RETARDED/CRAZY WHO TAKES ANOTHER'S LIFE?
 
In July of 2004, The Dallas Morning News reported convicted murderer Robert Smith had received a commuted sentence, removing him from death row, because he was deemed retarded. The News then added: "He (Robert Smith) will be moved to another prison unit to serve a life sentence and a 33-years sentence for aggravated robbery. He will be eligible for parole in about 10 years."

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Saturday, August 05, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#438)
 
"NOSE CANDY" CAN MAKE ONE STUPID
 
Christopher Plovie, on trial for Drug possession in Pontiac, Michigan, protested his body had been searched without a warrant, making his arrest illegal. The prosecution claimed a bulge observed under his jacket could have been a gun. To this remark, Mr. Plovie, who was wearing the same jacket in court, handed it to the judge for inspection, to prove the material and cut would not allow a bulge to show. But while examining one of its pockets, the judge found a plastic baggy of cocaine.

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Sunday, August 06, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#439)
 
THEY MADE HIM "TAG ALONG" TO JAIL
 
Reader's Digest tells of Jacob Wise, 18, a shoplifter in Tulsa, Oklahoma, who removed the security tags from several items of clothing, then tried to leave the store with them. That is, until the alarm system went off. Trying to leave no evidence of his caper, Wise had hidden all the removed tags in his coat pocket.

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Monday, August 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#440)
 
UUUUUUHHHHH............HOW'S THAT AGAIN?
 
While Public Television viewers in twelve cities watched doctors in Philadelphia reconstruct fifteen-month-old Michele Miller's skull, during a delicate operation broadcast live, the girl's parents, Lynn and Paul Miller, of Princeton, New Jersey, watched The Wizard of Oz on another channel.

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Tuesday, August 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#441)
 
SHE HAD A FIRM GRIP ON THAT SITUATION
 
In Bedford, Massachusetts, a 77-year-old wheelchair confined woman was charged with murdering her husband. Before he died, the elderly man told police his wife had constantly beat him with her walking cane, as well as with other objects, and refused to let him sleep. When he dozed off, he said, she would grab his genitals, then pull, squeeze and twist them until he could no longer stand the pain. The autopsy noted his genitals were "swollen to the size of small balloons."

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Wednesday, August 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#442)
 
A MEAL TO REMEMBER
 
For his twenty years of service to the community of Lakeland, Florida, James Moran was given a service pin and a certificate for a free dinner for two. Other workers in the past had spent between $34 and $60, but Moran and his fiancée ran up a bill of $511. This made his supervisor so angry, he suspended Moran for two weeks and demoted him to a lower position, which paid $11,000 a year less.

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Thursday, August 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#443)
 
GUESS THEY WEREN'T MEMBERS OF THE AFL-CIO
 
The government of China executed twelve male and six female factory managers by firing squad at a refrigerator plant outside Beijing in 1989, because the poor quality of their products constituted "unpardonable crimes against the people of China."

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Friday, August 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#444)
 
HE SHOULD'VE DRESSED LIKE A COW IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TRACKS
 
Soviet psychic E. Frenkel failed to stop a train with his powers. The train's engineer said Frenkel jumped onto the tracks with his arms raised and his head lowered just before the fast moving train crushed him to death. Pieces of a bloody note pad found on what was left of his body explained, "First I stopped a bicycle, cars and a streetcar. Now I'm going to stop a train."

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Saturday, August 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#445)
 
"I KNOW HIM AS WELL AS I KNOW MY OWN......."
 
Kevin L. Jones was arrested in a Richmond, Virginia, police station when he came in to bail out a friend. His surprised face, looking at his own wanted poster on the wall, caught the attention of a police officer who booked him.

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Sunday, August 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#446)
 
HE SLIPPED AWAY FASTER THAN INTENDED
 
Kourosh Bakhtiari, 21, attempted to escape from a New York City correctional center by braiding together fifteen rolls of waxed dental floss to make a rope. Unfortunately, the 190 pound would-be-escapee forgot to wear gloves. The friction cut tendons and ligaments in both his hands, leaving him, for a while, unable to even pick up a fork to feed himself.

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Monday, August 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#447)
 
PERHAPS THEY SHOULD PRAY TO GET THE LEAD OUT?
 
Dr. Margaret T. Taylor, an Australian physician, found the lead poisoning of an eight-year-old girl was caused by kissing her rosary beads, and now feels the cause of widespread anemia among nuns and devout Catholics is probably caused by this source of lead.

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Tuesday, August 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#448)
 
HE ALTERED GEOGRAPHY TO REWRITE HISTORY
 
In the 1980s, to get even with England for shutting down the Libyan embassy in London, Col. Muammar Abu Minyar al-Qadhafi ordered England be deleted from all Libyan maps. To take its place a new arm of the North Sea was added, bordered by Scotland and Wales.

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Wednesday, August 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#449)
 
ICE CREAM, CANDY, CASH, ALL AT ONE CONVENIENT LOCATION
 
After Los Angeles ice cream vendor Victorino A. Parades, 55, was beaten to death by several youths, an estimated two dozen witnesses rushed forward to steal all his ice cream, candy and cash. (Just beneath society's thin veneer of civility exists creatures no less or more than common cockroaches.)

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Thursday, August 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#450)
 
BET THIS ATTORNEY STILL CRIED ALL THE WAY TO THE BANK
 
Prosecutors in the murder case of Cleophus Prince, Jr., 26, showed a videotape of the victim to emphasize the tragedy of her death. Among the people in the courtroom overcome by emotion while watching the tape was Prince's attorney, whose loud sobbing prompted the judge to call a recess. (The jury later sentenced Prince to be executed.)

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Friday, August 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#451)
 
RUB-A-DUB-DUB, CHUG-A-LUG
 
In 1982 Lever Brothers Company began offering Sun Light dishwashing liquid with lemon juice added. This caused some consumers to think it safe to add to iced tea and other beverages. According to Maryland's Poison Center, this resulted in the poisonings of at least 80 people.

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Saturday, August 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#452)
 
BIGOTS AGAINST RACISM
 
A black female student at the University of Pennsylvania was asked to leave a meeting of the White Women Against Racism, because she was black. Director of the Women's Center, Elena DiLapi, said her group believes racism "is a white problem, and we have a responsibility as white women to do what we can to eradicate it."

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Sunday, August 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#453)
 
GOSH, ANYBODY CAN MAKE A FEW MISTAKES
 
Health officials in Taiwan fined Hsiao Ming Hospital the equivalent of $12,200, and barred it from accepting patients for two weeks, after one of its surgeons removed the appendixes of 11 children, all of whom only suffered minor food poisoning.

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Monday, August 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#454)
 
CONVICTED UNDER HIS OWN LAW
 
A sexually exploitative video, featuring a 17-year-old boy, got a conviction against former Colorado State Rep. David Bath. Back in 1991, while Bath was in office, he'd sponsored a bill against sexual exploitation of minors, under which he himself was convicted.

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Tuesday, August 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#455)
 
HE CAN SAVE HIS BATTERIES WHILE COOLING HIS HEELS
 
When Alfred E. Acree was stopped by Charles City County, Virginia, sheriff's deputies, the known drug dealer jumped from his car and began running through dense woods. But even on that moonless night he was soon captured, wearing his L.A. Gear battery-operated sneakers, which flashed light each time one of his heels made contact with the ground.

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Wednesday, August 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#456)
 
GIVES "GOOD FRIDAY" ANOTHER MEANING
 
Increasing numbers of teen pregnancies in York County, Pennsylvania, caused local leaders to try and teach abstinence through self control, by declaring Monday, March 22, 1993, "The Great sex-Out Day." One teen interviewed said, Monday without sex wouldn't be too difficult but if it were Friday, that would create a conflict.

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Thursday, August 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#457)
 
SMOKEY THE BEAR WOULD HANG HIS HEAD IN SHAME
 
To demonstrate the dangers of fireworks as July 4th grew near, firemen and police gathered at a bomb disposal range near San Diego to explode thousands of illegal fireworks for the news media. Sparks from the explosions set fire to dead grass, which burned 10-acres of brush, that took 50 firefighters, two water-dropping helicopters and a bulldozer to put out.

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Friday, August 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#458)
 
JUSTICE WAS BLIND OVER THIS SHOCKING DEATH
 
In 1992, the Illinois Supreme Court reinstated a $1.5 million verdict against the Chicago Transit Authority, over the death of Korean immigrant Sang Yeul Lee. Mr. Lee had been electrocuted back in 1977 when he urinated on the center rail of a CTA train track.

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Saturday, August 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#459)
 
THOU SHALT NOT RUN OVER THY BROTHER'S KEEPER, OR HIM
 
Two new sins were added by Pope John Paul II in 1989: bad driving and speeding. The Pope told Italian auto club members who attended his weekly audience, reckless drivers will have to answer to God. (Perhaps he could swap covetousness and adultery for reckless driving and speeding, to keep the commandments at ten?)

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Sunday, August 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#460)
 
THEY DONE DUNG THEM FARMERS WRONG
 
With dairy cattle dropping 15,000 tons of dung monthly on Delhi streets and walkways, overloading the city's sewer system, the Indian government demanded farmers remove all their cattle from the city. But farmers became outraged when they learned their same government was considering importing dung from the Netherlands to promote organic farming.

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Monday, August 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#461)
 
HOW TO INSULT NAKED PEOPLE
 
Officials in Cap d'Agde, location of France's largest nudist colony, posted signs warning: NUDITY OBLIGATORY, and hired police to make sure everybody got naked before entering. Mayor Gerard Paillou called the invasion of clothed vacationers, "intolerable."

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Tuesday, August 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#462)
 
THESE BROTHERS HAD A SHEETY ATTITUDE
 
A fight broke out, on campus of the University of Ohio, when a group of black male students confronted a group of white students, who were on their way to a Halloween party. The white sheets the party goers wore caused them to look like members of the Ku Klux Klan to the blacks, but in reality their costumes were designed to look like the pope and his entourage.

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Wednesday, August 30, 2006 - On Vacation
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Thursday, August 31, 2006 - On Vacation
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Friday, September 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#463)
 
WHO HAS THE POWER TO REMOVE A SENILE SUPREME COURT JUSTICE?
 
In 1995, U.S. Supreme Court Chief Justice William Rehnquist, for the first time of any judge in Supreme Court history, altered the sleeves of his judicial robe by adding four stripes on each sleeve, after watching Gilbert and Sullivan's comic opera Iolanthe. (Which, among other things, makes fun of British courts.)

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Saturday, September 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#464)
 
"WHILE YOU GET UNDRESSED I'LL RUN THIS BY MY ATTORNEY"
 
Oklahoma State Rep. Cleta Deatherage introduced a bill requiring all men to obtain advanced written permission from any women before having sexual contact with them. This included warning the women they could become pregnant, and childbirth could be hazardous to their health. If the female could not read the contract, the contract must be verbally explained in her native language. (The bill was defeated.)

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Sunday, September 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#465)
 
SHE HURRIED HIM TO HEAVEN
 
Chicago missionary Michele Schwartz, 41, was arrested for the murder of her husband, the Reverend Charles Jones. The killing occurred during an argument over housework and who had saved the most souls. When police arrived they found Jones dead and Schwartz reading her Bible.

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Monday, September 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#466)
 
READ THIS ONE 10 TIMES AND IT STILL MAKES NO SENSE
 
After a couple in Leigh, England, had been foster parents to 47 children, they were told they could not adopt one for their own because the home was too normal. Social services officials explained to Harry and Ester Hough that a child growing up in the blissful environment of their home would receive insufficient exposure to negative experiences.

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Tuesday, September 05, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#467)
 
A HEAVY HANDED ATTORNEY
 
George Goldsborough, a prominent attorney in Easton, Maryland, was accused of spanking an employee and numerous clients in his office. An ex-law partner said he found a copy of Spanking and the Single Girl in the office and, long before, locals had begun calling that law firm Spanky and the Gang.

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Wednesday, September 06, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#468)
 
MACABRE MONEY
 
While death row inmate James David Autry awaited execution in Huntsville, Texas, in 1954, $280 of commissary privileges were collected from other prisoners, creating a "Texas Lotto," which would be paid to the prisoner who guessed closest to Mr. Autry's actual execution time. Had Autry have won a reprieve, he would have won the lotto as well.

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Thursday, September 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#469)
 
A CONVENIENT EXCUSE OF PUKE
 
OSHA director of health standards, R. Leonard Vance, told a committee of Congress in 1986 he could not turn over log books, which might have proven improper meetings with industry representatives, because his dog had vomited all over them.

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Friday, September 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#470)
 
WELL, NO ONE TWISTED THEIR ARMS TO PLAY IT
 
After a new video game named "Arm Champ II" was developed and put into operation in game parlors throughout Hong Kong, five young men broke their arms trying to out-wrestle it. Although the machine cautioned "Play at your own risk," it was written in English, while most players were young Cantonese.

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Saturday, September 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#471)
 
CALORIES FROM AN UNUSUAL SOURCE
 
After many complaints from citizens of Princeton, West Virginia, that the city's water tasted foul, an official was sent to crawl up the side of one water tower to investigate. And, looking down inside, he found the problem all right. Floating on the surface of the water was a decomposing human corpse.

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Sunday, September 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#472)
 
IN EITHER CASE HE GOT TO SLEEP BEHIND BARS
 
Terry Allen, 34, was arrested and charged with attempted burglary in San Antonio, Texas, while taking the bars off a beauty shop window. He argued with police he should only be charged with attempted theft because he lived in a high crime area, and was stealing the bars to put on his own windows to keep burglars out.

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Monday, September 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#473)
 
HE WENT FROM DIAPERS TO MASTERPIECE
 
In 1993, the prestigious Manchester (England) Academy of Fine Arts awarded the painting Rhythm of the Trees its top award. The judges said it won over the almost 1,000 other entries with its "certain quality of colour balance, composition and technical skills." The painter, Carley Johnson, was only four-years-old. His mother had entered his "mess" in the contest simply as a joke.

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Tuesday, September 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#474)
 
HE "URNED" HIS WAY INTO THE STADIUM
 
San Francisco 49ers fan Les Boatwright died of a heart attack while holding two tickets to 1989's Super Bowl XXIII. But his two sons went to Miami's Joe Robbie Stadium for the big game, along with their father, his ashes carried inside a cremation urn.

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Wednesday, September 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#475)
 
YEP, THEY DIDN'T WANT CRIMINALS BREAKING IN
 
The city council of El Paso, Texas, voted to spend $112,000 to hire a private security firm to guard that city's police station.

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Thursday, September 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#476)
 
THE BIDDER MUST'VE HAD A REALLY BAD HEADACHE?
 
At auction on E-bay in April 2004, the highest bidder paid $3,200 for a plain, white aspirin because it was carried in a small tin container inside astronaut Michael Collins' space suit while he orbited the Moon.

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Friday, September 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#477)
 
WHAT IF THE LAST SUPPER HAD BEEN A COVERED DISH AFFAIR?
 
The St. Aldate Church in Gloucester, England, became so strapped for cash, the Reverend Derek Sawyer asked his congregation to put more money in the collection plates. Several weeks later, still falling short of paying church bills, the Reverend announced to the faithful they would have to begin bringing their own communion wine and bread to lower costs.

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Saturday, September 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#478)
 
ONLY 32? SHE MUST'VE BEEN AN ELITIST
 
In the spring of 2004, Dallas Morning News columnist Larry Powell, writing about the anniversary of a Southern California UFO cult, relayed the following: "In 1974, Ruth Norman, 75, high priestess of the Universal Articulate Interdimensional Understanding of Science Foundation (UNARIUS), prepared her 65-acre mountain-top property near San Diego for a summer convention of leaders from 32 other planets." (Wonder if she planned to cook all their favorite dishes?)

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Sunday, September 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#479)
 
(THIS FACT IS BEING RESEARCHED FOR FURTHER CLARIFICATION)
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Monday, September 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#480)
 
WHAT GOD OF LOVE WOULD DEMAND FILICIDE? NONE! ONLY MAN
 
The Associated Press reported from Ankara, Turkey, a 14-year-old girl was first kidnapped, then raped and returned home to her family in disgrace. So her father, Mehmet Halitogullari, legally wrapped a wire around the neck of his already battered child, and choked her to death. (Much the attitude and atmosphere which begins the lives of many al Qaeda members.)

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Tuesday, September 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#481)
 
WONDER WHICH DUMMY LOOKED BETTER IN THAT UNIFORM?
 
Cadet Robert Langenbech was suspended without pay for three days from the Somerville, New Jersey, Sheriff's Department for using a dummy stuffed uniform to stand guard in his place at the Somerset County courthouse, while he took naps.

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Wednesday, September 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#482)
 
THIS BIG MAC ATTACK WAS A KIDNAPPING
 
A statue of Ronald McDonald was stolen from outside a fast-food restaurant in Canonsbury, Pennsylvania. A ransom note was found near the drive-in window demanding 150 hamburgers, 150 milkshakes and one diet coke to go.

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Thursday, September 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#483)
 
ENOUGH ALREADY! CALL THEM "HONKYBEES!" WHO CARES?
 
A county supervisor in San Diego, California, tried to have his colleagues rename the Africanized honeybee because he said the name had racial overtones.

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Friday, September 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#484)
 
HAVING ANTS IN YOUR PANTS HERE COULD BE VERY PROFITABLE
 
Illegal drugs come in many forms. In the United Arab Emirates, Dubai police report catching a number of youths getting "high" smoking dead ants, or sniffing the fumes ants release when crushed. In the capital city of Abu Dhabi a small packet of "samaseem"- Gulf Arabic for ants- sell for upwards of $135.

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Saturday, September 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#485)
 
WHILE SHOWING HER POSTERIOR SHE LANDED ON HER CAN
 
Returning from a bachelorette party on a chartered bus, Tammara Joe Klemkowski, 32, of Waldorf, Maryland, tried dropping her pants to "moon" passing cars through the emergency window. But she kept ramming her naked backside against the glass until it gave way, leaving her "butt" on the road, then in the hospital.

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Sunday, September 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#486)
 
SHE COULD USE PROFITS TO INVEST IN LONG TERM JUNK BONDS
 
Preparing for her death, Altona Brown, 90-years-old and blind, paid $2,946 for an oak coffin to be used at her American Indian burial ceremony. That is until the U.S. government decided her unique container was in reality an investment, one which might increase in value. That's when she was told to either sell the coffin or risk having her Social Security income and Medicare reduced, or perhaps even stopped.

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Monday, September 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#487)
 
HIS ARREST WAS "IN THE BAG"
 
British customs officials at London's Heathrow Airport became suspicious of Robert Ventham, 22, who had just returned on a flight from Gibraltar, causing them to search his belongings. Sure enough, inside his golf bag they found drugs and he was arrested. But why were authorities suspicious of a young man returning from a golfing vacation? Gibraltar has no golf courses.

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#488)
 
THEY GOT TO SHARE THEIR COMING HOME PARTY
 
Hoping to impress their teenaged dates, Jessie N. Kase, 20, and James J. Kalk, 23, drove their underaged female companions onto restricted grounds outside Ohio Pickaway Correctional Institute, where both men had spent several years of their lives. After police stopped the stolen car and determined the two girls were runaways, all four were "invited" inside the facility.

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Wednesday, September 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#489)
 
HAIR GROWING OVER HIS KNUCKLES TYPE LAWMAKER
 
During a debate to eliminate state-funded abortions for poor women by the North Carolina State Appropriations Committee in 1995, 71-year-old Republican Henry Aldridge explained, "The facts show people who are raped, who are truly raped, the juices don't flow, the body's functions don't work, and they don't get pregnant." Aldridge's reason for taking the floor had been to apologize for an earlier comment that rape and incest victims were sexually promiscuous.

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Thursday, September 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#490)
 
GUESS THIS NEWS HAD HER PLAYING A DIFFERENT TUNE?
 
Melanie Stevens, 29, a nurse in Los Angeles, was on her way to see a patient when she noticed a cello lying on the sidewalk near a trash bin. Taking it home, she asked her cabinetmaker boyfriend to convert it into a CD holder. Good thing he was still busy on another job. A few days later Ms. Stevens read a 320-year-old, $3.5 million Stradivarius cello had been stolen about a mile from where she had found it.

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Friday, September 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#491)
 
HER FINGERS DID HER WALKING ALL THE WAY TO THE CEMETERY
 
Frank Xu of San Antonio, Texas, was given only 9-years in prison for strangling his wife, Melissa Wang. He had killed her during a rage over a $460 phone bill, a bill created by calling her relatives in China. He got his lenient sentence after his confession was thrown out.

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Saturday, September 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#492)
 
BEING MISERABLE WAS NOT THE FUN HE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE
 
Pleading guilty in a Pietermaritzburg, South Africa, court to shoplifting, Michael Dladla, 22, told the judge he would like to be sentenced to life so he could write a book like Nelson Mandela about being in jail. However, after several days in jail, Dladla told the judge he had changed his mind. He was released with a warning.

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Sunday, October 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#493)
 
THESE DIGNITARIES WERE DEFINITELY NOT JEWISH OR MOSLEM
 
When a library in San Jose, California, was dedicated to the civil rights leader Martin Luther King, Jr., a large 30-foot high banner, with messages in 27 languages, was raised before the entrance of the building to signify unity. However, one of the brightly colored greetings, which should have read "WELCOME" in Tagalog (main language of the Philippines), embarrassed the attending dignitaries from that country by spelling out "CIRCUMCISION."

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Monday, October 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#494)
 
DARNED! HE KNEW HE FORGOT SOMETHING
 
Ronald Goolnick, 47, could only be charged with attempted robbery by police in La Crosse, Wisconsin, because in his haste to leave the bank, he forgot and left "his" money on the counter.

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Tuesday, October 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#495)
 
DEER REVENGING THEIR OWN
 
Kelly Kyle, 17, was standing in her parents' living room in a heavily wooded area of Pennsylvania, when suddenly a deer crashed through a large picture window, followed by four other deer, which all together "trashed" the main part of the house. While his home was being destroyed, Kelly's father was away on a deer hunting trip.

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Wednesday, October 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#496)
 
WELL, IF THAT AIN'T A HIT IN THE HEAD
 
Phil Klusman, a sportswriter for the Bakersfield Californian, was killed during the 1986 track and field championship in Los Angeles when an athlete threw a 16-pound Olympic style hammer directly on top of his head. Klusman had attempted to protect his skull by quickly holding his clipboard over his head.

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Thursday, October 05, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#497)
 
LARGE AMOUNTS OF MONEY CAN BE A HEAVY BURDEN
 
Brink's guard Hrand Arakilian, 34, was crushed to death while riding in the back of an armored car in Laguna Hills, California. It happened suddenly as that vehicle lurched forward at a traffic light. That's when a rack containing $13,000 in quarters, weighing 832 pounds, fell back, crushing the guard to death.

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Friday, October 06, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#498)
 
THAT'S A SLOW WAY TO TAKE THE BITE OUT OF CRIME
 
Forbidden to possess dental floss while serving his time in an Oregon prison, a 31-year-old prisoner sued that state insisting the stress of being unable to fight tooth decay was making his stay at the penal institution less than rehabilitating.

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Saturday, October 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#499)
 
"YOU GOT MILK ?" "NOPE, SPERM."
 
Charles Kyser lost $3,275 when a thief stole two thermos bottles sitting on the seat of his pickup truck in Omaha, Nebraska. Kyser, the owner of a cattle breeding business in Ainsworth, told police that both thermoses were filled with fresh bull sperm. (Bet that "cows' cream" in the crooks coffee caused calamity.)

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Sunday, October 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#500)
 
BRAVO! HURRAH! MAKE THAT A $5,000 FINE!
 
Rep. Fred Williams introduced a bill to the Missouri lawmaking body to make it illegal, with fines up to $200, for blowing one's nose in public restaurants, if done so in a "loud, obnoxious, or offensive manner."

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Monday, October 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#501)
 
ARE YOU READY TO GET MAD, REALLY MAD?
 
Terence Hadenham, 44, was convicted in Portsmouth, England, of gross indecency and indecent assault on a six-year-old girl. Banging his gavel, Judge John Whitley sentenced the guilty defendant to a fine of $75 and three-years probation, adding his feelings that Mr. Hadenham's stunted growth and hearing impairment made it difficult for him to form a relationship with women. He (the Judge) did not wish to punish the handicapped man any more than he had already been punished.

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Tuesday, October 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#502)
 
THE CITIZENRY FEEDING SHARKS IN LAWYERS' CLOTHING
 
A bus in St. Louis carrying five passengers was rear-ended in traffic. In the short time it took police to arrive, the bus that had originally contained five, now contained an additional fourteen, all complaining of whiplash.

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Wednesday, October 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#503)
 
HE "ANT" GOT NO MONEY, SO HE AIN'T GOT NO WEDDING
 
The Kenya News Agency reports on a dirt-poor farmer from near Isiolo in northern Kenya who dug up his life savings of 2000 shillings (About $150) from a field to pay the dowry to marry, but discovered all his bank notes had been eaten by ants, meaning there could be no wedding.

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Thursday, October 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#504)
 
WAS IT THE BREAST DECISION TO MAKE?
 
The IRS refused to let exotic dancer Cynthia S. Hess, known professionally as "Chest Love," deduct the $2,088 she spent on cosmetic surgery to enlarge her breasts to 56FF. But U.S. Court Judge Joan Seitz Pate ruled it helped to increase her taxable income, therefore, it should be allowed.

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Friday, October 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#505)
 
HE WAS PROBABLY ON COBAIN TYPE DRUGS, TOO
 
Gaston Lyle Senac, 20, of Tracy, California, accidentally blew out his own brains while showing friends exactly how rock star Kurt Cobain committed suicide.

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Saturday, October 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#506)
 
IT'S PARTY TIME, NOT
 
In 1991, a few days before the New Year's holiday season celebrations were to begin in China, the Communist Party from Beijing warned all citizens against excessive spending and celebrating, reminding them, any more than "a cup of tea" at year-end parties could subject them to stiff fines.

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Sunday, October 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#507)
 
HIS NAME BY ANY CLAIM IS A SHAME
 
In 1993, Randy Kraft filed a $60 million lawsuit against author Dennis McDougal and his publisher Warner Books, arguing their book Angel of Darkness defamed his name. Mr. Kraft filed his lawsuit from death row while awaiting execution for the sexual torture-murders of sixteen men.

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Monday, October 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#508)
 
THIS WAY, WHAT THEY PRAY FOR IS EASIER TO GRAB
 
The Seminole Health Club near Miami has a Christian ministry meeting twice weekly, in the nude. Religious leader Elijah Jackson says, "Nudity adds something to Christianity." (And the byproduct causes the birth of our next generation.)

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Tuesday, October 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#509)
 
TURKEY? HE'LL BE EATING NOTHING BUT CROW FOR A WHILE
 
George Hiser, a conservation agent for Ray County, Missouri, took his wife Marcia turkey hunting. In the woods, not only did she drop one bird 40-yards away, but also killed a second turkey 15-yards behind the first, both with the same shot. Of course George, having the authority of a game warden, had to write her a ticket for doubling the maximum kill under law, one bird a week.

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Wednesday, October 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#510)
 
A SNAIL MAIL SNAFU
 
When the U.S. Postal Service needed an expert witness list at a Dayton, Ohio, court the next day, the request was sent using its own Overnight Express mail. But instead of being sent to Dayton, this mail was sent to Washington, D.C.. It finally arrived at its intended destination 10 days later.

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Thursday, October 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#511)
 
THIS COULD SAVE A LITTLE WEAR-AND-TEAR ON THE KNEES
 
Announcing his dislike for the Supreme Court's strict separation of church and state, Rev. Edward Mullen of St. Edwards Catholic Church in Providence, Rhode Island, informed his congregation he would no longer allow parishioners to pray for government officials in "his" church.

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Friday, October 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#512)
 
HIS HOBBY COULD BE STANDUP COMEDIAN AT FUNERALS
 
Dr. Glenn D. Warden was scheduled to become president of a national surgeons' association, when officials at the Shrine Burn Institute in Cincinnati exposed his "comical" side, which they observed while he was a resident there. In one case, they reported, the good Doctor scratched his initials into the skull of a dying infant. Also reported, he drew "happy faces", using felt markers, on the genital areas of two patients. Dr. Warden explained he was only trying to ease the tension over surgery.

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Saturday, October 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#513)
 
ELSIE THE BORDEN MILK COW HAD SOME COMPETITION
 
Lilja Virtanen, 28, of Jyvreshylae in central Finland, received that country's medal of merit for delivering her extra breast milk to a hospital, where it saved the lives of 20 premature babies. Mrs. Virtanen continued breast feeding her two-year-old son, while selling her milk to the hospital for $5.00 per liter. In nine months she produced around 300 liters (79 gallons).

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Sunday, October 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#514)
 
WONDER IF HE USES TARTER SAUCE DURING AUTOPSIES?
 
Dr. Greg Lewbart of North Carolina State University is one of only a few veterinarians in the U.S. who treat pet fish. He charges about $100 for an office visit, including ex-rays. Surgery generally runs about $250. Dr. Lewbart said business was good.

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Monday, October 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#515)
 
SOUNDS LIKE THESE GUYS COULD'VE USED A "TIME OUT"
 
Refugio Tarin, thirty-three, was driving along in his pick up truck when he decided to reach over his buddy (Manuel Carrasco, fifty-four) sitting next to him, to shoot his other passenger, Jesus Carrasco, thirty-six, just as Jesus leaned forward to shoot Refugio, with both dying almost instantly. Presidio, Texas, Sheriff Rick Thompson said, "It was just the three of them in that pickup and they started arguing. The poor guy in the middle didn't have anyplace to go." (Except to change his "undies" afterwards.)

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Tuesday, October 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#516)
 
SIX REASONS TO PLAY DEAD
 
Police in Brightwood, Ohio, were called to a home by a man fearing his neighbor had died. He explained each time he knocked on his friend's door he could look through the window and see him sitting on the couch as still as death. When police summoned the "dead" man to the door, he explained, "I have a cold six-pack of beer in my refrigerator, and he knows it."

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Wednesday, October 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#517)
 
GRAMPS PROBABLY APPRECIATED THIS VERY MUCH
 
The Associated Press lists 5 excuses written by parents for kids to give their schools: (1) "Please forgive Fred for missing school yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well." (2) "Please forgive my son for being. It was his father's fault." (3) "Please excuse Mary from P.E. yesterday. She was administrating." (4) "My son is under doctor's care and should not P.E. today. Please execute him." (5) "Please excuse my daughter for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps."

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Thursday, October 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#518)
 
HE COULD MAKE A LIVING RENTING HIMSELF TO CIRCUSES AND ZOOS
 
The luxury car maker Rolls Royce fired a young punk rocker at their Bristol, England, plant because the four-inch spikes on his hairdo endangered the eyes of coworkers. Punker Peter Mortiboy's usual daily dress included 18 earrings, a studded dog collar, steel armlets, and a stud through his nose.

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Friday, October 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#519)
 
HE'D BEEN BETTER OFF GAY
 
Frederick the elephant, after many years of pestering by seven aggressive she-elephants, died of a heart attack, brought on by stress, near Jutland, Denmark. Leif Nielsen, director of Givskud Lion Park explained, "He gave up hope of a decent life after many sufferings at the "hands" of his wives." Every time Frederick turned his amorous attention to one female, all the others would mob him out of jealousy, Nelson added.

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Saturday, October 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#520)
 
OPTIONS. OPTIONS? HOW ABOUT A BRAIN-SCAN FOR BUYERS?
 
For $10,000, options extra, a New York company, Animal Manors, Inc., will build a doghouse that is an exact replica of the owner's home.

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Sunday, October 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#521)
 
DON'T GUESS BULLETPROOF BIKINIS WOULD HELP?
 
In war-torn Sarajevo in May 1993, fashion designers and the Bosnian army organized a "Miss Besieged Sarajevo" beauty contest, hoping to raise morale amid all the death and suffering. During the contest, several of the young female beauty contestants wore banners written in English with statements such as, "Don't Let Them Kill Us." The 17-year-old beauty winner told reporters, "Plans? I have no plans. I may be dead tomorrow."

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Monday, October 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#522)
 
DO THEY WORK THROUGH LUNCH, EATING SANDWICHES, PERHAPS?
 
The Associated Press reported from Porthill, Idaho, that Dennis and Pam Ponsness are proud owners of a maggot farm, where they allow tons and tons of dead fish to rot in the sun, in order to attract hordes of flies, in order to harvest millions and millions and millions of maggots to produce commercial fishing baits.

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Tuesday, October 31, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#523)
 
HE SHOULD'VE COOKED THE HELL OUT OF IT FIRST
 
Hoping to purge himself of Satan, Franco Brun of Toronto, Canada, tried eating his entire 874-page pocket Bible. After gagging himself to death, an autopsy revealed he'd died from the New Testament, which was still stuck in his throat.

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Wednesday, November 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#524)
 
PERHAPS THE THREE GHOSTS WERE MAKING THEIR POINT?
 
"Here I am!" shouted lawyer N. Graves Thomas, 40, while standing up in his boat in the middle of Lake Bistineau outside Bossier City. Louisiana. That was also the exact moment a bolt of lightening from a brewing storm would end his life. At the time of his death, Thomas had been representing Ronald Richie in a Bossier Parish court case. Richie was accused of reckless boating in the deaths of three people on that same lake.

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Thursday, November 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#525)
 
WHAT HAPPENED TO "PRAISE THE LORD, I SAW THE LIGHT!"?
 
Myra Obasi of Shreveport, Louisiana, was driven 225 miles to Parkland Memorial Hospital in Dallas, Texas, by her two sisters because she had been blinded in both eyes. Police later arrested both sisters for gouging out Myra's eyes because they thought she was possessed with their father's cruel ghost. Detectives had to wait several hours to interview the blinded Myra, until she stopped chanting, "Thank you, Jesus!....Thank you, Jesus!....Thank you, Jesus!"

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Friday, November 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#526)
 
ACCIDENTAL INCEST?
 
Thirty years ago (1979), Dr. Paul Wexler, a chief of obstetrics in Denver, began warning that generous donations of sperm from eager donors would proliferate in the general population, until accidental incest became common; so common, society would suffer widespread genetic disorders.

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Saturday, November 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#527)
 
HE SHOULD KEEP IT IN HIS NOSE, WHERE IT BELONGS
 
A Hong Kong court heard Cheung Yun-fuk, 33, explain he had been unable to control his right thumb since childhood, and that was the only reason he had pinched a woman's bottom helping her from a cab.

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Sunday, November 05, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#528)
 
BIG BREASTED BROADS BATTLE OVER BIGGEST BOOBS
 
Police broke up a hammer and tire-tool fight between two large, large breasted women at a Mesquite, Texas, truck stop. The two women truck drivers had begun their argument over CB radios as to who had the largest breasts, so they decided to meet and compare sizes, but ended up losing their tempers.

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Monday, November 06, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#529)
 
HOPEFULLY SHE DIDN'T USE THIS FOR "SHOW AND TELL"
 
When an 8-year-old girl in Huntington, West Virginia, opened her box of Cracker Jack looking a prize of a nifty whistle or plastic ring, she found instead, a small book complete with very graphic pictures, titled: Exotic Sexual Positions From Around the World. Betty Garrett, spokeswoman for Borden Inc., makers of Cracker Jack, said five other altered boxes were found.

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Tuesday, November 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#530)
 
DRIVING ALONG, MINDING HER OWN BUSINESS, SHE GOT INTO A JAM
 
When the windshield of Kitty Wolf's car was shattered by a falling case of 1.5-oz. jars of Dickinson's Fancy Sweet Marmalade, it took the FAA to conclude that case of jam had been left on the wing of a Regent Air plane, just before it departed from Newark International Airport.

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Wednesday, November 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#531)
 
HAD THEY BEEN IN HIS POCKET WOULD HE STILL BE ALIVE?
 
After Donald McGarity was hit and killed instantly by a hit and run driver near Sacramento, California, a coroner found his spinal column had been severed, virtually locking his body in an exact frozen position at the moment of his death. The dead man's middle fingers on both hands were extended, while all his other fingers were folded.

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Thursday, November 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#532)
 
INSTEAD OF MATERNITY FROCKS SHE NEEDED A STRAIGHT JACKET
 
During her 38th week of pregnancy, Doris Kennedy, a London housewife, became so depressed over delays in the construction of her baby-to-be's bathroom, she hanged herself to death.

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Friday, November 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#533)
 
HE WASHED AWAY HIS SINS...AND BREATHING ABILITY
 
When Julius McNeil, 28, arrived early at a Jackson, Mississippi, church for his brother's baptism, he went inside to wait, fell into the baptismal tank and drowned. (Praise Bob!)

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Saturday, November 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#534)
 
IS AMERICA A GREAT COUNTRY, OR WHAT?
 
During President Reagan's 1985 swearing in, Robert Latta, a Denver, Colorado, water meter reader on vacation, followed 33 members of the U.S. Marine Orchestra into the White House. He wandered around the Executive Mansion for about 15 minutes and was eventually discovered and arrested for unlawful entry. Several months after his arrest, Latta returned for a sentencing hearing, but instead went to the Senate Gallery, where he asked to speak on the floor of the Senate.

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Sunday, November 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#535)
 
"MEANER-THAN-A-JUNKYARD-DOG"
 
During a struggle to arrest Lugene Kendricks on robbery charges, two policemen in Lynn, Massachusetts, feared they would be attacked by the suspect's pit bull terrier. Instead, while his dog looked on, Mr. Kendrick bit patrolman William Althen on the arm, just before chewing on patrolman Edward Kiley's hand.

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Monday, November 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#536)
 
MUST THE SHEEP BELIEVE ALL THE SHEPHERDS SAY TO DO?
 
In 1993, an Israeli phone company installed a fax machine at the Wailing Wall for believers to contact God. Same year, the Roman Catholic Church introduced a high-tech confessional that accepted confessions by fax. Also in that same year, a sect of Orthodox Jews in Brooklyn, New York, began selling special beepers so believers could instantly hear the Messiah's arrival on earth.

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Tuesday, November 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#537)
 
HAD HE ROBBED THEM THRICE, WOULD THAT BE A DOUBLE DEJA VU?
 
Todd W. Bariteau, Sr., was sentenced to prison in Troy, New York, for twice robbing a boutique named Deja Vu.

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Wednesday, November 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#538)
 
A BUBBA BY ANY OTHER NAME......
 
A $10.4 million lawsuit was filed against the Rockwood, Tennessee, Police Department for the arrest of James "Bubba" Wilson. The suit stated officers walked upon Mr. Wilson's mother's front porch and asked him if his name was Bubba? When he said "yes," they arrested him, and he was not released from jail until authorities determined they had the wrong Bubba. ("Bubba" is the most common male name in Rockwood.)

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Thursday, November 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#539)
 
LIZARD BIRTH CONTROL?
 
The United Nations Human Rights Commission was asked by three aborigines to stop the Amax Minerals Company from digging on land sacred to their tribe's lizard god, Goanna. They feared the deity might tell their favorite food, the 6-foot monitor lizard, not to breed.

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Friday, November 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#540)
 
IT WAS SCOTTISH POET ROBERT BURNS' FAVORITE DISH
 
Haggis Content

Haggis Content

Yum, Yum! Here is the recipe for making Scotland's national dish, Haggis: Take raw minced sheep heart, lung and liver, mix with oatmeal, onions and black powder. Stuff these ingredients into a sheep's stomach and boil until the whole thing turns dishwater gray. This meaty plate is then served with turnips. (And, hopefully, a strong brew.)



 

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Saturday, November 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#541)
 
CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS WAS DEFINITELY NO HUMANITARIAN
 
When Christopher Columbus landed on Hispaniola, now named Haiti/Dominican Republic, he met the local Arawak natives and wrote in his log, "They would make fine servants." His first "law" was all inhabitants of the island over 14-years-of-age would be required to give him a set amount of gold each three months, or both their hands would be chopped off. He shipped many (who still had hands) back to Spain, where they were sold as slaves in Seville. (Columbus Day? Why?)

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Sunday, November 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#542)
 
WAS THIS POLICEMAN SUFFERING DONUT WITHDRAWAL...OR WHAT?
 
New York City resident Jose Rodriquez, 69, was waiting in the passenger seat of an automobile idling on a busy street in Manhattan, when a traffic officer demanded he move the car. Even though Mr. Rodriquez pleaded he did not know how to drive, the irate officer demanded he move the vehicle anyway. Following the policeman's orders, non-driving Mr. Rodriquez drove through a crosswalk, mowing down nine pedestrians in the process.

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Monday, November 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#543)
 
HIS FAVORITE MEAT WAS THE BUTT ROAST
 
Jorge Delgado, 23, better known as "Dog Man" in Punta Arenas, Chile, was arrested for sinking his teeth. Sinking his teeth into what? Sinking his teeth into a large number of buttocks belonging to young ladies of the community.

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Tuesday, November 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#544)
 
HE COULD'VE MAILED THEM AS KISSES TO HIS ENEMIES
 
Filbert G. Maestas told a Denver, Colorado, court his constitutional rights were violated when the policeman who arrested him laughed because of what he had stolen; several boxes of frozen rennets (cow rectums).

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Wednesday, November 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#545)
 
SITTING ON A WAD OF MONEY COULD CURE HIS BACK
 
Back in 1993, State Legislatures Magazine reported Kansas lawmakers tightened workers compensation in that state, after one of the workers compensation agency's own doctors filed a claim, saying his severe back pains were caused by sitting on too many cramped witness stands. (Heh, heh, that's almost funny!)

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Thursday, November 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#546)
 
THANKSGIVING WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN HIS FAVORITE DAY
 
After Charles VIII, 1470–98, King of France (1483–98), took the throne, he became so obsessed with the idea of being poisoned, he seldom ate, and eventually starved to death at age 28.

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Friday, November 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#547)
 
HE FEATHERED HIS FANNY WITH FOWLS
 
Police in Baltimore, Maryland, noticed Thomas Waddell because his large pants were making motions in many directions, all at once. Before they could look down his pants, however, a pigeon flew through the waist band to freedom. This caused Waddell to be strip searched, which turned up 26 more birds, 5 already dead.

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Saturday, November 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#548)
 
NOW SHE CAN PLAY BINGO IN PRISON
 
Mrs. Carol Alexander was given life in prison by a Vernon County, Wisconsin, judge. She'd paid off her $65,000 bingo debts with money from her husband's life insurance policy, after she stabbed him to death.

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Sunday, November 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#549)
 
WHAT A GREAT AUDIENCE FOR A STANDUP COMIC
 
A very rare disease (Kuru), with a mortality rate of 100% , has been observed only in the South Fore Tribe of eastern New Guinea. Researchers think the condition, much like Mad Cow disease, is probably caused by that tribe eating the brains of their enemies. These sufferers suffocate while laughing themselves to death.

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Monday, November 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#550)
 
AS USUAL, THE PAPER WORK IS THE HARDEST PART
 
Just as Edward Brisson, of Burlington, Vermont, got properly seated on his toilet, and began to enjoy a magazine, truck driver Lawrence Pecor, 64, of Essex, lost control of his truck on the road just outside. The vehicle broke through the wall, into the house, where it dumped 14 tons of sand, leaving Brisson still on his toilet, his pants down around his ankles, with sand up to his shoulders.

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Tuesday, November 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#551)
 
MUCH MORE THAN BARE BUNS IN BRAZIL
 
During Brazil's 1994 Country Carnival, President Itamar Franco, 63, waved from a float pulled several miles down a parade route, to the cheers of roaring crowds. Standing on the float with President Itamar, was his "fiancee," 27-year-old Lilian Ramos. Wearing a pink miniskirt, she enjoyed raising her arms to wave at the crowds, sharing with thousands the fact she was wearing no underpants.

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Wednesday, November 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#552)
 
EATING THIS CRAP COULD MAKE A COW MAD
 
Many commercial ranches, which supply our nation with beef, increase their profit margins by filling cattle with a urea-carbohydrate mix containing ground newspaper, feathers, chips of wood and molasses; molasses because it is the only way a cow can be persuaded to eat this mess their bodies are not designed to accept.

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Thursday, November 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#553)
 
HOW CRUEL! SHE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE CABLE TV BACK THEN
 
In the early 1600s, Countess Elizabeth Bathory of Hungary was caught after murdering an estimated 600 local young girls over the years, believing bathing in their blood would keep her young forever. But, since her death sentence was to be walled-up alive inside her own castle, no one was able to observe how well she aged, while she slowly starved to death.

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Friday, December 01, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#554)
 
WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO DINOSAURS, DODO BIRDS AND PARENTING?
 
Donna Goldberg opened a business in New York City, in 1992, called Organized Student. To teach children and teenagers how to clean their rooms, she charged from $85 to $125 per hour. A ninth-grade client quoted in The New York Times said, "I try to keep going by myself, but I can't do it." (He might have also needed a priority adjustment applied directly to his Butt?)

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Saturday, December 02, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#555)
 
EGOS IN THE COURT SYSTEM
 
The Dallas Morning News reported July 10, 2004, that Dallas County Criminal Judge Dan Wade was mad at Dallas County Prosecutor Richard Jackson because defense attorney Mark Deuber tattled that prosecutor Jackson had made some unflattering remarks about "His Honor." (Perhaps this judge should've had a private "pity party" before court?)

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Sunday, December 03, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#556)
 
MUST BE HELL HAVING ONE'S BRAIN SQUEEZED?
 
Back in the early 1980s, the Dallas Cowboys had a soccer-style kicker named Rafael Septien. Once he blamed a missed easy field goal on "the grass was too tall," while standing on artificial turf. Another time, missing a 3-point attempt, he explained, "My helmet was too tight and squeezed my brain. I couldn't think." (Wonder what his excuse was in 1987, when Septien was convicted of fondling his 10-year-old niece?)

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Monday, December 04, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#557)
 
THE ELIMINATION OF A SPECIES
 
When Portuguese sailors first landed on Mauritius in 1507, they found the dodo bird (raphus cucullatus), a bulky, very unintelligent, flightless bird, which had no natural enemies on the island. Feral dogs, pigs and monkeys introduced to the island killed the birds and ravaged their nests. By the late 1600s, the last dodo bird ever seen on earth had been destroyed.

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Tuesday, December 05, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#558)
 
PERHAPS EVERYONE SHOULD VOTE LIKE THIS?
 
Just before the elections of six different U.S. Presidents, between 1972 and 1992, Polly, a Plainview, Minnesota, cow picked each winner correctly. During the final days before the '92 election, as usual, Polly the Prognosticating bovine was removed from her pen, while ten pictures each of the presidential candidates, Clinton, Bush and Perot were placed on the straw covered floor like tiles, edge-to-edge. First thing Polly did when she returned was take a big "splat" on the poster face of Bill Clinton.

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Wednesday, December 06, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#559)
 
THIS SLAW COULD GO WELL WITH ROADKILL STEW
 
The health board in South Dennis, Massachusetts, closed down the Wing Wah Chinese restaurant because of a long list of health violations. One easy to see violation occurred behind the restaurant each morning. That's where the cook prepared that day's slaw by placing a dozen or so heads of cabbage in a large laundry bag, then put the bag between two 4x8 feet sheets of plywood, before driving the restaurants old delivery van back-and-forth over the sandwiched cabbage.

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Thursday, December 07, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#560)
 
AND YOU THOUGHT BUSH/GORE 2000 FLORIDA VOTE COUNT SUCKED
 
For weeks, even months, before the 1968 national elections in Poland, 21.5 million eligible voters were bombarded with loudspeakers playing recorded political promises, while thousands of large and colorful posters showing candidates belonging only to the National Unity Front party blanketed walls and windows throughout the nation. Voters were instructed to simply pick up their ballots at one of 17,500 voting stations, then deposit them in provided ballot boxes. There was no need for anyone to mark their ballot because no one was allowed to run against the candidates.

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Friday, December 08, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#561)
 
IS THIS JUST ANOTHER FORM OF CHILD ABUSE?
 
The National Organization of Circumcision Information Recourse Center designated 1987 the "Year of the Intact Child" believing, without a clear medical reason, arbitrary removal of the male infant foreskin is considered barbaric and linked to religious ignorance. Adding, if males were not already circumcised when they became adults, virtually no male would ever be circumcised except for medical reasons, no matter what the religion.

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Saturday, December 09, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#562)
 
IT IS DIFFICULT TO PROTECT PEOPLE FROM THEMSELVES
 
Tamika Johnson, 19, was given a citation for jaywalking across a street in Pomona, California, just after 2 P.M. on May 23, 1994. A few minutes later, after the policeman who wrote her the ticket had left, Johnson again crossed the street. Only this time she was run over by a car, leaving her with two broken legs.

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Sunday, December 10, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#563)
 
HE HAS A NASTY VIEW OF LIFE
 
In 1992, the Austin American-Statesman printed a story on John Stapp, a Travis County sewage treatment plant supervisor. His main job was to put on a diving suit and do repairs on the bottom of 16 x 40 feet sewage storage vats, while they still contained 60,000 gallons of raw sewage. At the end of his day, Stapp said food was the thing on his mind: "I'm usually starved when I get through."

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Monday, December 11, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#564)
 
THIS KID MAKES DENNIS THE MENACE LOOK LIKE A NEOPHYTE
 
After Mikey Sproul, age 3, made national news in 1993 near Tampa, Florida, by "driving" his family's car up U.S. 41, hitting two cars, he exclaimed, "I went zoom!" Then, a few weeks later, Mikey took a cigarette lighter and burned down his family's home, sending his father to the hospital with second and third degree burns. When interviewed, Mikey shrugged his shoulders and summed it up nicely, "Now I have no house." In April 1996, Mikey (now age 6) burned his mother's current house in Tampa, resulting in $45,000 in damages. This time he had no statement for the press.

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Tuesday, December 12, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#565)
 
WELL, WE KNOW BOTH SIDES SCORED
 
The SkyDome Hotel, built inside of Toronto's stadium, has 70 rooms which directly overlook the field. Hotel manager Ray Thompson says guests are now warned to be careful what they do in their rooms with the drapes open. During a game between the Jays and the Mariners, a couple making love in their room's window drew a larger audience than the game.

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Wednesday, December 13, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#566)
 
TAXIDERMIED AFTER DEATH, SHE'D MAKE A GREAT SCARECROW
 
Mother as Coffee Table

Mother as a
Coffee Table

In 1992, Advertising Age's creative magazine reported Minneapolis photo-artist Judy Olausen had completed nine photos of her seventy-year-old mother. One pose showed her mother down on all-fours with a plate of glass on her back. Its label, "Mother as Coffee Table." In another, Olausen's mother is lying next to a highway. This one is labeled, "Mother as Road Kill."



 

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Thursday, December 14, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#567)
 
AT LEAST IT WASN'T A CHILD THIS TIME
 
A sexual abuse lawsuit made public in Albuquerque, New Mexico, stated Catholic priest Robert Kirsch had sexual intercourse with one of his female parishioners. While Father Kirsch admitted to having sex with the woman, he stated his vows were not violated. The nude contact with her was merely a "reserved embrace," which he said was sexual intercourse with "no passion, no kissing, no seminal emission." Therefore, he went on to explain, it was proper conduct under Catholic theology.

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Friday, December 15, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#568)
 
FERTILIZER FOR THE BRAIN?
 
During an anti-drug conference in 1992 in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysian deputy minister Megat Junid Ayob said shortages of both heroin and cannabis had caused addicts to stoop to sniffing cow dung.

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Saturday, December 16, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#569)
 
LIKE, IF YOU HIT A GUY ON A MOTORCYCLE INSTEAD OF IN A CAR
 
Convicted police killer Merrill Chamberlain sued the Albuquerque Police Department for not training its officers properly. According to him, had the officer he killed pointblank been wearing a bulletproof vest, he would not have died. Therefore, Chamberlain's claim stated, he should only be serving a term for attempted murder.

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Sunday, December 17, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#570)
 
A BOUQUET WEIGHING 180 POUNDS!
 
Rafflesia arnoldii

Rafflesia arnoldii

If you've like to cast the final blow in a bad relationship, send your ex-love a nice bouquet of stinking corpse lilies (Rafflesia arnoldii). In addition to the repulsive name and awful odor, an average bloom weighs about 15 pounds.



 

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Monday, December 18, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#571)
 
PERHAPS THEY MOPPED THE WINE SECTION WITH THEIR TONGUES?
 
Inside a Safeway grocery in Oxon Hill, Maryland, just after 10:00 AM on Christmas Day 1993, customers ready to check out found no cashiers on duty. In fact, looking around, the shoppers found absolutely zero employees working that Christmas Day. Police were called and soon determined employees working the night before, on Christmas Eve, had forgotten to turn off the lights and lock the doors.

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Tuesday, December 19, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#572)
 
HIS DRIVER'S LICENSE WOULD'VE LOOKED PRETTY FUNNY
 
Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Clito Ruiz y Picasso (1881-1973), we know as Pablo Picasso or just simply Picasso.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Wednesday, December 20, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#573)
 
THEY HAD PREPARED FOR THE INEVITABLE
 
January 1994, in California, chickens were laying eggs as usual at the largest producer of chicken eggs in the U.S., when a 6.6 earthquake, with an epicenter only 5 miles away occurred. Damage at the farm included: breaking a water line, knocking over stacks of egg pallets........yet, only one egg was broken.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, December 21, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#574)
 
A PLACE TO LEARN TO HATE ART, A MILE AT A TIME
 
The Winter Palace and adjacent Hermitage in Leningrad, in the former U.S.S.R., has 322 sections and three million works of art. It is the world's largest art gallery, and covers a total walking distance of 15 miles.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Friday, December 22, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#575)
 
COFFEE, THE SECOND TIME AROUND
 
Kopi Luwak

Kopi Luwak

From the Los Angeles Times, the Nova Cafe in Santa Monica, California, sells (or sold) Kopi Luwak, the world's most expensive coffee, costing about $130 a pound. The owner of the cafe explained to the reporter that each and every coffee bean had been passed through an animal, the luak, a species of civet cat endemic to Java. It eats the ripest coffee cherries for the sugar, digests them and then excretes the undigested coffee beans. From there, natives collect the beans from piles of defecation (looking much like brown, nut laden candy bars). Then, washed and processed, the beans are ready to be enjoyed by the world's most curious/discriminate coffee drinkers.



 

Andrew J. Hewett

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Saturday, December 23, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#576)
 
A BABY MACHINE WITH A DIFFERENT FACE
 
Most marriages in rural India are arranged, especially among Hindus, which are 82% in a population of 880 million people. The Times of India reports the heavy veils worn by two brides at a double wedding ceremony caused them to marry the wrong husbands. But, because they had already done "the seven perambulations around sacred fire," the elders determined the marriages were final.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Sunday, December 24, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#577)
 
WOULD YOU WATCH SPERM RACES ON TV?
 
According to KRLD News Radio, producers in England are already taping "the ultimate" reality/survival television show. During weekly segments these producers take a childless woman, give her a medical exam, then impregnate her by artificial inseminations, using the sperm from two male donors. Using ultramodern medical technology, they will watch and record the race between each group of sperm cells trying to beat the other to get the woman pregnant.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Monday, December 25, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#578)
 
THESE GUYS ARE ALL WET, IN THE HEAD
 
The London Independent's weekly magazine reported several years ago on adult men who go to the Hush-a-Bye Club in southern England, where these, not so manly, men pay to crawl around on the floor dressed as infants. Owner "Mummy Clare" calls them each such names as "Baby Michelle" or "Baby Cathy," while supplying them with baby food, bottled milk and diaper service, all for only $110 a day. Of course, spankings cost $7 extra, but probably well worth it?

Andrew J. Hewett
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Tuesday, December 26, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#579)
 
THAT JESUS THING MADE HIM CROSS WITH EVERYONE
 
"The Great Peace Rebellion" (1851-64) caused the deaths of between 20 and 30 million Chinese. The Manchu government was pitted against peasants of the Southern Ming Dynasty, led by a crazy man, Hung Hsiuch'uan, who totally believed he was the younger brother of Jesus Christ.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Wednesday, December 27, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#580)
 
THE ONE AND ONLY GORDIE HOWE
 
During 25 years of playing pro hockey for the Detroit Redwings (1946 to 1971), Gordie Howe received more than 500 stitches to his face.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Thursday, December 28, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#581)
 
"I'LL HAVE 36 EGGS OVER EASY, BACON, TOAST AND COFFEE"
 
If the only eggs you could buy were hummingbird eggs (they measure one-half by one-third of an inch), making an omelet would require cracking about two dozen eggs. Making a cake needing the whites of 6 eggs would mean separating the yokes from whites of at least two-and-a-half dozen of these tiny undeveloped embryos.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Friday, December 29, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#582)
 
THIS POOR OLD LADY SUFFERED BAD CLAPS
 
Edna Hobbs sued the makers of "The Clapper," in a New York court in 1993, claiming she had hurt her hands badly trying to applaud their product loudly and often enough to turn on her lamp. She testified: "I couldn't peel potatoes (when my hands hurt). I never ate so many baked potatoes in my life. I was in pain." The judge ruled she had the "sensitivity" control set too low, and the case of the clapper was closed.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Saturday, December 30, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#583)
 
HE WANTED SPARK IN THEIR ROMANCE
 
The Dallas Morning News reported on William Joseph Wolfe, 34, a Rush County man who decided to prepare his wife a romantic bath, complete with bubbles, candle light and music. As his wife, Teresa, entered the warm bath and smiled back at her husband, Wolfe picked up the radio supplying the romantic music and threw it to her (still plugged in). Fortunately, for her, she caught the radio before it hit the water. Her husband, however, was charged with second degree attempted murder.

Andrew J. Hewett
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Sunday, December 31, 2006
FACT OF THE DAY (#584)
 
WELL, AT LEAST HE DID GET A RIDE
 
During a 1994 cold spell in Columbus, Ohio, George Gibbs, 23, determined his car would not start because of a frozen fuel line. Planning to run warm gasoline through the line to thaw it, this purpose driven young man attempted to heat two gallons of gasoline on his cook stove. (Next, he was rushed by ambulance to a hospital with second and third degree burns.)

Andrew J. Hewett
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