Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, January 01, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE AND UNUSUAL (#1576)
MIGHT BE BETTER OFF TREATING HEMORRHOIDS, FROM THERE?
While up to half the 150 million doses of aspirin taken daily worldwide are taken in the U.S., in tablet form, in
other countries the form can vary greatly. For instance, the fizzy type, similar to Alka Seltzer, is most popular in Italy. While the
English prefer to swallow powder, and the French (wouldn't you just know it) administer their aspirin by inserting suppositories down
below.
OFTEN THE OBVIOUS IS THE MOST OVERLOOKED
Historians recording names and birth/death dates from the graveyard of Evercreech Church, near Shepton Mallet,
England, found only the initials H.W.P. on one stone, leaving them at a total loss as to who was buried there. And, it would have
remained a mystery, if not for the caretaker. It was he who explained the HWP on the stone told plumbers that (underneath) they would
find a turn-off valve for the churches HWP (i.e. hot water pipes).
BUT WAIT, WHAT ABOUT THE INTEREST?
Jerry Hendricksen, a businessman in Spokane, Washington, was going through his mother's old papers after her death,
when he found a 61-year-old unpaid hospital bill. The bill was for his own 1935 birth. Mr. Hendricksen then traveled to St. Mary's
Hospital in Pierre, South Dakota, and paid his bill of $70.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1576)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1577)
A MAN PRESIDENT LYNDON BAINES JOHNSON MAY HAVE ADMIRED?
U.S. President Martin Van Buren's vice president, Richard Mentor Johnson, was known as a crude and vulgar man, who
turned his back on Washington society. He married three times, each wife being a slave. When his second wife ran away with the man she
really loved, Johnson had her captured and sold at a slave auction. During the early part of his term, he opening a saloon spa on his
farm in Kentucky, then spent most of his time there, away from Washington.
HOW LARGE DID THE FAMILY NEED TO BE TO QUALIFY?
In 1983, the Guinness Book of Records entered Leontina Albina, a woman living in Chile, as the most
prolific mother on record, worldwide. Between 1943 and 1981, she claimed to have given birth to nine sets of triplets, eleven sets of
twins, and six single births, producing a total of 55 children. A few years later they removed her name when it became clear the claim
could not be proven. She gave birth to only 16 of the children. The others were given to her by other poor women or cousins. Why?
To collect food assistance that the government grants to large, poor families.
PEOPLE ARE SHEEP WITHOUT THE WOOL
The Brooklyn Bridge of New York, constructed under the supervision of John Augustus Roebling over a period of
thirteen plus years, was called by many the 8th wonder of world. Just six days after it opened to the public, on May 30, 1883, a rumor
started that the bridge was about to collapse, causing a panic race to leave the bridge, and the deaths of twelve people.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1577)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1578)
NOW HE COULD TRY FOR THE 'LONELY AND BROKE' RECORD
Determined to break the 400-day world record for flagpole-sitting, Frank Perkins of Los Angeles climbed up on top
of one in 1992. Suffering from the flu he came down eight hours short of the 400-day record. Not only did he miss setting a new record,
his sponsor had gone broke, his girlfriend had left him, and his electricity and phone had been cut off.
ANOTHER BIRTH RECORD
On June 13, 1971, Geraldine Brodrick of Sydney, Australia, gave birth to nontuplets, meaning a group of nine (in
this case five boys and four girls). All died before reaching one week of age.
NOW HIS VERACITY "HANGS" IN THE BALANCE
In June of 2006, the United Kingdom's Times Online reported a hoax perpetrated by a Suffolk craftsman,
David Lucas, with an obsession about capital punishment. Mr. Lucas told an undercover reporter that he sold gallows to Zimbabwe and
other governments, which still used hangings as capital punishment. He claimed a single gallows sold for an amount equal to
$22,000 U.S., while his Multi-Hanging Execution System, mounted on a trailer, went for the equivalent of $185,000 U.S. More than 30 top
newspapers, including The Guardian, the Daily Mail, and the Sydney Morning Herald followed the story.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1578)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, January 04, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1579)
THEY DUCKED OUT ON A CHANCE TO WATCH FIRST HAND
Markku Tahvainen drove his family two-hundred-and-fifty miles from their farm in Finland to observe bears feeding
in the wild. Returning home a few days later, the first thing he and his family noticed was all their ducks had been eaten....and the
footprints and droppings left in their garden proved a bear had committed the crime.
ANOTHER RECORD
The official record for the heaviest person to have ever lived is John Brower Minnoch of Bainbridge Island,
Washington, who's body weight hovered around 1,400 pounds. Seldom able to stand for more than 30-seconds, Minnoch spent most of his time
sitting on a couch naked, except for a blanket. With a 110-inch waist, no clothing was possible. And, as his health worsened, instead of
calling for an ambulance, a fork-lift and open-bed truck were used for his trip to the hospital.
WRONG KIND OF MEAT FOR THAT BURGER
When the McDonald's hamburger franchise first offered their "Big Mac" in Paris, it went out under the name
Gros Mac. But it wasn't long until several Parisians let them know gros mac meant "big pimp" in French.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1579)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, January 05, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1580)
HE COULD'VE SOLD HIS GUN INSTEAD OF DOING THE CRIME
In 1990, Danny Simpson of Ottawa, Canada, was given six years in prison for robbing a bank of $6,000. When the
police examined the .45-caliber pistol he had used in the robbery, it looked so old and out of date, one officer decided to take the
serial number and have it checked. Surprisingly, it was a rare type of which only 100 were made, making it worth up to $100,000.
HERE WE GO AGAIN WITH "PEOPLE ARE SHEEP"
Near the end of a World Cup soccer match June 27, 1969, between bordering Central American countries El Salvador
and Honduras, an official called a penalty, giving Honduras a chance to score and win. As news of the penalty spread among the people,
riots broke out in both capital cities, and a rampage of lootings and beatings began. Six days later, on July 3rd, war was declared.
Five days later the war was over. But the aftermath cost some 2,000 lives and collapsed the Central American Common market, which led to
severe food shortages, causing much starvation.
HE GOT ALL CHOKED-UP AT THE WEDDING
The newspaper Jam-e Jam, reporting from Qazvin, Iran, said the 28-year old groom of a local wedding had
choked to death during the reception. While traditionally licking honey from his new wife's fingers, he accidentally swallowed one of
her artificial finger nails, then gagged for several minutes, while horrified guests watched him suffocate.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1580)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, January 06, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1581)
AS THEY USED TO SAY, "GIVE 'EM HELL HARRY"
The thirty-third U.S. president, Harry S. Truman (1884-1972), was known for his bawdy language. For instance: "My
choice early in life was either to be a piano-player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any
difference."
ONE WAY OR THE OTHER THE JOB GOT DONE
In Cebu city, Phillippines, Enrique Quinanola, 21, tried to commit suicide by hanging himself, but friends cut him
down, and took him to a hospital. There, while doctors prepared a sedative for him, Quinanola snuck away to a nearby restaurant and cut
both his wrists with a steak knife. Police arriving from the hospital tried to subdue him, but with no luck. During the struggle one of
the officer's guns misfired and hit Quinanola in the chest. He died a few minutes later.
THAT'S LIKE PUTTING ON SHOES, THEN SOCKS
On June 2, 1924, the United States Congress granted all American Indians United States citizenship.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1581)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, January 07, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1582)
AMEN!
Considered by many to have been Hollywood's greatest actor, Marlon Brando (1924-2004): "Why should anybody care
what a movie star has to say? A movie star is nothing important. Freud, Gandhi, Marx -- those people are important. Movie acting is just
dull, boring, childish work".
AND YOU THOUGHT YOUR FAMILY WAS DYSFUNCTIONAL
The Dallas Morning News reported in the June 3, 2006, edition that a grandfather and grandmother in Tavares,
Florida, tried to hire a hit man to kill their three grandchildren and daughter-in-law to stop them from testifying against their son in
his rape trial. Lake County sheriff's Sgt. Christie Mysinger, said the couple offered $100, with a promise of more later, to an
undercover sheriff's deputy.
AND THE PASSENGERS WERE CRYING OVER HIGH AIRFARES
According to BBC news, several planes requesting landing instructions as they approached Britain's Luton airport,
instead heard a small infant crying. Authorities, after searching 12 hours for the source, located a faulty radio baby-monitor inside
the home of Lisa Spratley, near the airport . Later the makers of the monitor gave Lisa a properly working one.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1582)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, January 08, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1583)
HER NEIGHBORS WILL ALWAYS LOVE HER, NOT
Helen Stephens, 20, was hauled into court for playing music too loudly from her flat in Cleveland, England.
Residents of her apartment building told the court Ms. Stevens not only played her music loud, day-and-night, for six straight weeks,
but always played only one tune, Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You". (The judge gave her a week in jail for disturbing the
peace.)
LESSON: DON'T STUFF YOUR SMUGGLING DRUGS INSIDE FISH
Drug-sniffing dogs are common in law enforcement. Now there's a fish-sniffing cat named Rusik. This valuable
feline is (or was) stationed at a police control post in the southern Stavropol region of Russia. The Itar-Tass news agency
reported Rusik's ability to detect contraband, including the Caspian Sea sturgeon, which produces the world's most expensive caviar...
makes him worth his weight in gold.
ONE BURRITO PLEASE, BUT HOLD THE MOUSE
On June 2, 2006, Ryan Daniel Goff, 20, was sentenced to 16 to 30 months prison by a Traverse City, Michigan, court
for stuffing a dead mouse inside a Taco Bell burrito, in an attempt to extort money from the franchiser.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1583)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, January 09, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1584)
WITH THAT ATTITUDE HE'S HALFWAY TO PASSING THE BAR
When Terry Allen, 34, was caught by San Antonio, Texas, police removing burglar bars from a local business, he
complained they should not charge him with attempted burglary, claiming all he was doing was stealing the bars to make his own home more
burglarproof.
CHEAP LABOR GONE A STEP TOO FAR
A Reuters report from Sao, Paulo, Brazil, tells of a judge inspecting a local prison who found nothing in
one watchtower but a straw scarecrow, dressed in a guard's uniform, rifle in arms, "guarding" 720 prisoners.
WONDER WHO HARVESTED THOSE ONIONS? THIEVES, PERHAPS?
Florian Iorga, 42, and his son Aurel, 16, could hardly wait to harvest their bountiful crop of onions, to sell at
the market place in Bucharest, Romania. They were also determined to protect their onions from thieves. For this they encircled their
field with naked electrical wire, then plugged it in each night at sundown. It worked great. Three nights after Florian and Aurel
installed their high voltage crop protector, they heard a noise from the darkness and rushed to the field to find their results. And the
results were? They forget to turn off the power.... both died from electrical shock.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1584)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1585)
LET'S HOPE THEY HADN'T JUST VACUUMED
Reuters news service from Rio De Janeiro, Brazil, reported heavy rains had flooded the city, causing
landslides. In one case, a couple living in their home below a hillside cemetery, had its wall collapse during a mudslide, filling their
kitchen and master bedroom to the ceiling with not only mud, but numerous skulls, arm and leg bones, rib cages, and a few rotted coffins
which had not stood the test of time.
THIS AUDIENCE CAN WATCH RERUNS AT THE NEXT PERFORMANCE
The Fortean Times gives an example of theatrics becoming reality when reporting on the world premier of the
play The Winter Guest, at England's Leeds Playhouse. The plot centers around a small town cut off from the outside world by a
blizzard. The entire audience had to be put up for the night because during the performance a blizzard made it impossible for anyone to
leave.
IS THAT OKAY, IF THEY SCOOP OUT THE MANURE OCCASIONALLY?
Birmingham, England, hospital manager Robert Naylor admitted his health care facility is very short on funds. He
said that is why they "rent out" their $750,000 mobile cancer scanner to veterinarians, who use the expensive equipment to help farmers
more profitability breed their sheep and pigs.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1585)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1586)
NOTHING LIKE A HEALTHY SALAD TO SEND ONE ON THEIR WAY
Virginia state police were called to an auto accident along Washington's Capital Beltway, which killed a driver.
Police spokesperson Lucy Caldwell said an assortment of lettuce, tomatoes, olives, and small chunks of ham inside the car, and inside
the deceased's mouth, indicated he was enjoying a Caesar's salad at the time of his death.
MORE FUN TRIVIA
In 1889, two entrepreneurial thinking men, Chris L. Rutt and Charles G. Underwood of St. Joseph, Missouri, began
making and selling "Self-Rising Pancake Flour, naming it "Aunt Jemima," after a song in a minstrel show.
HIS TEETH ADMITTED A MOUTHFUL
A man police dubbed the "bumbling bank robber" entered a Wachovia Bank in Miami, Florida, pulled a gun and robbed
the teller of $16,000. But running from the bank, stuffing the gun in his waistband, it accidentally fired. Luckily, no harm was done.
Next, he stepped off the curb just in time to be hit by a truck. The robber, addled by the impact, still managed to get back on his feet
and stagger to a getaway car, but left behind his hat, gun and two gold teeth. The teeth were tested by the FBI for the owner's DNA, it
matched that of a felon on file, and the case was solved.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1586)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, January 12, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1587)
OOPS, SORRY
On June 8, 1967, while the U.S. Navy ship Liberty was stationed in the Mediterranean, Israeli forces attacked the
ship and killed 34 U.S. servicemen. (Israel later said they made a mistake.)
MORE FANTASY THAN THIS GUY COULD HANDLE
The Tampa Tribune tells of Paul Shimkonis, a 38-year-old Florida man, who claimed he suffered whiplash at a local
topless bar, when a dancer dropped both her large breasts on top of his head. "It was like two cement bags hitting me. I saw stars. I've
not been myself since", he told the court, concerning the September 27, 1996 incident.
WARNING: THE FOLLOWING IS NOT POLITICALLY CORRECT
From Ronald Schwartz's book, Men are Lunatics, Women are Nuts!, a quote from actor Jack Nicholson: "If you want to
resist the feminist movement, the simple way to do it is to give them what they want and they'll defeat themselves. Today, you've got
endless women in their 20s and 30s who don't know if they want to be a mother, have lunch, or be secretary of state."
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1587)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, January 13, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1588)
WORDS USUALLY RESERVED FOR THE HONEYMOON
John and Tracey O'Donnell got into a fight at their own wedding reception, and both were arrested by Westport,
Connecticut, police. The bride said her new husband fed her a slice of wedding cake too roughly, after she'd asked him to take it easy
and be "more gentle".
IN A ROUNDABOUT WAY MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS SAVED HER LIFE
In March 1996, the Sunday Oklahoman profiled the story of Oklahoma City homemaker Mary Clamser, 44, because
of two unusual circumstances that changed her life. First, in 1994, Ms. Clamser was suffering from deteriorating multiple sclerosis,
when her house was struck by lightening. Grounded to metal with her hands, and also wearing metal leg braces, the shock returned her
ability to walk. Next, in 1995, in order to appear on a California television show and tell her story, she canceled an appointment at
Oklahoma City's Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building, at 9:00 AM on April 19th (which would have placed her among the 168 killed, or 500
wounded, when Timothy McVeigh blew it up).
PERHAPS SHE ALREADY DRANK A NIGHTCAP....OR TWO?
On one dark evening in Hamburg, Germany, an emu (which looks like an ostrich) escaped into a nearby family
neighborhood. There it was mistaken for a peeping tom. This occurred when a lady, in her bedroom, heard a pecking at the window and
looked outside to see what she concluded to be a bare-chested man, with a very large head, and two huge eye balls.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1588)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, January 14, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1589)
THESE CANDIDATES COULD WEAR MASKS
Apparently some candidates running for public office in East Windsor, Connecticut, had some really "winning
smiles"? Voter officials there banned political candidates from smiling within 75 feet of any polling place. One overseer, Mary Rajala,
said hanging around and smiling constituted electioneering.
QUALITY/QUANTITY OF LIFE MUST ALWAYS BE CONSIDERED
England's Nursing Standard magazine reports an 85-year-old retired nurse had "DO NOT RESUSCITATE" tattooed
on her chest. Seeing too many patients resuscitated during her 45-year nursing career, assured her having to "die twice" just wasn't
worth it.
HOW ABOUT: "100% DISCOUNT ON SIX TOTALLY DESTROYED CARS"
From Not a Good Word About Anybody, Riverside Chevrolet in Jacksonville, Florida, began a new sales campaign with
large white banners proclaiming "Look for it! Something BIG is going to happen". A few hours later their showrooms ceiling collapsed,
destroying six new cars.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1589)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, January 15, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1590)
THEY ALMOST HAD A PRECOOKED MEAL
Electric power was cut to 5,000 San Francisco residents, so a chicken could be rescued. Pranksters had caused it
all by releasing a chicken with dozens of helium balloons attached to it. As the chicken rose, the balloons came in contact with
high-power transmission lines, necessitating a power shut off for three hours to rescue the bird. (Taken to an animal shelter, the plump
chicken was soon "adopted".)
HE WAS KNOWN TO BE A BIT SOUR AT TIMES
Industrialist Henry Ford (1863-1947), a genius in many ways, also had a goodly amount of "hang-ups". For instance,
the reason he stopped eating sugar, altogether. This decision was made in an instant the first time Ford saw granulated sugar crystals
under a microscope. The magnification of the crystals' sharp edges made them appear as shards of broken glass, making it impossible for
him ever again to add sugar to anything he consumed.
THEIR "BLUE LIGHT SPECIALS" WERE BLACK AND BLUE BODIES
The China Daily reported the opening of a new supermarket in the Inner Mongolian city of Baotou. Unprepared for
the onslaught of 50,000 desperate shoppers, employees (and later police) were unable stop the chaos, resulting in the death of two and
injury of hundreds.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1590)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1591)
OR CHANGE GONE WITH THE WIND TO FLATULENCE PASSED
Britain's Daily Mirror reports a London theatre company, wishing to be less offensive, changed the name of
the play they were performing, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, to The Bell Ringer of Notre Dame. The producer, Oddsocks
Productions, said they feared offending people with spina bifida.
HOW CENTER STRIPES ON ROADS AND HIGHWAYS CAME TO BE
By 1917, Dr. June McCarroll of Indio, California, had seen enough automobile wrecks along the dangerous stretch of
road leading to her office and decided to do something about it. What she did was, take a brush and bucket of paint to the center of
that road, then paint a mile long stripe down the middle to help drivers stay on their right side. Through the Indio Women's Club,
McCarroll began a vigorous letter writing campaign on behalf of her proposal. The idea was adopted by the California Highway Commission
in 1924 and 3,500 miles of lines were painted at a cost of $163,000.
YOU COULD EASILY "PATCH UP" A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THIS
When Israeli prison guards found a vinyl blowup doll in the cell of 35-year-old prisoner Amir Hazan, it was
confiscated. This made Mr. Hazan so lonely he petitioned the court for "her" return. In turning down his plea, the court stated not only
would the body-shaped balloon be an easy place to hide weapons and drugs, but, if shared with other prisoners, might spread sexually
transmitted diseases. (PUKE!)
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1591)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1593)
ALL THAT CASH WAS BURNING A HOLE IN HIS POCKET
On June 14, 2006, The Dallas Morning News reported the robbery of a Washington Mutual bank branch in
downtown Ft. Worth, about 3:30 P.M. the day before. Police Lt. Dean Sullivan said after the robbery, witnesses had watched the man go
into a western wear store, then come back out several minutes later wearing a new western outfit. Next, they said, he caught a bus going
south. Lt. Sullivan later admitted, police stopped buses leaving downtown but were unable to locate the suspect.
THREE REASONS WHY AUTO INSURANCE IS SO EXPENSIVE
From a long list of excuses given to police by drivers after having an auto accident:
(1) "The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run so I ran him over."
(2) "I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident."
(3) "I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car."
( From- Knuckleheads In The News by John Machay)
MORE FUN TRIVIA
What is the tallest man-made structure on earth? It's not Chicago's Sears Tower, at 1,454 feet. It's the Auger
Tension Leg Platform, which rises 3,280 feet off the seabed in the Gulf of Mexico. Built at a price of 1.2 billion, this oil platform
is made to withstand 70-foot high waves, even if a hurricane lasted 100 years.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1593)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, January 18, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1594)
HIS HOT DOGS AND HUSH PUPPIES CAME FROM REAL DOGS
According to the UPI news service in Copenhagen, Denmark, Prince Henrik, honorary president of the Danish
Dachshund Club, and owner of several dachshunds, said without shame: "I do not mind eating dog meat at all. It tastes like rabbit,
like dry venison, or like veal, just drier." (He also suggested the meat of man's best friend be sautéed or grilled before slicing.)
MAKING DEATH MORE FUN FOR WHOM?
Death and funerals being such a depressing time for survivors, a funeral home and coffin company in Rome, Italy,
uses (or used) pretty young women wearing only bikinis for sales staff. The front page of their website showed a lovely "widow" crying,
wearing zebra shorts and high-heel boots, kneeling next to a casket, while another page has a blonde wearing a black G-string, leaning
on a coffin.
INSTEAD OF THEIR BALLS, THEY HAD THEIR MINDS IN THE GUTTER
Classic Lanes Bowling in Greenville, Wisconsin, decided to have some fun, so they posted a sign outside stating:
BOWL NAKED, BOWL FREE. And, for the next few days, both customers and the owner made jokes about the offer. But they stopped laughing
on April 16, 1996. That's the day twenty-three-year-old Scott Hughes walked in, rented a lane and shoes, picked out a ball and took off
all his clothing, before releasing his first ball. Then, while all the other bowlers stopped to gawk, Mr. Hughes, wearing nothing but a
cowboy hat and bowling shoes, rolled a "decent" score of 225.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1594)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, January 19, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1595)
A PROBLEM SOLVED, PERIOD
Reuters news service reports the Al Thawra daily in Sanaa, Yemen, printed a story of a 40-year-old man who
became so disgusted with his wife for "screaming and complaining" during their 15-year marriage, he left and remarried another woman,
one he knew would not raise her voice, ever. That's because his new wife was both deaf and mute.
LET'S HOPE HE BREAKS A LEG KICKING HIS OWN BUTT
While serving time in the Chesapeake Correctional Facility in Virginia, Robert Lee Brock filed a $5 million
lawsuit against himself. In his suit, Brock accused himself of going against his religious beliefs by getting drunk and committing
crimes. He wrote in his plea, "I want to pay myself five-million-dollars [for this breach of rights] but ask the state to pay it in
my behalf since I can't work and am a ward of the state".
A SHIP WITHOUT ITS COUNTRY
The U.S.S. Phoenix, launched in 1938, survived Japan's attack on Pearl Harbor in 1941, was sold to Argentina
in 1951 and commissioned in the Argentine Navy as Diecisiete de Octubre, and renamed the General Belgrano in 1956. She
was finally sunk by the British Navy during the Falkland war in 1982.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1595)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, January 20, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1597)
GHOSTS DON'T EAT OR BATHE, SO WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
The South China Post reported the Hong Kong Housing Authority was having a problem renting out about 80
apartments because perspective tenants felt they were haunted. That's because inside each apartment either murder or suicide had
occurred. Even homeless families refused, preferring to remain on a long waiting list for an unusual vacancy to occur in any of the
other 3,000 government apartments offered for the most needy.
A FACT FROM CHINA
Most children born in the People's Republic of China celebrate their first birthday when they are thirty days old,
then another when they are one year old. Then no more birthdays until that person is ten. From then on, each tenth year is celebrated,
with the most important birthday being at thirty, when that child becomes an adult.
HERE'S SOMETHING THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN EVERY DAY
In August of 1995, Ronald Legendre married his fiancée, Hope. They were married by Judge Ronald Legendre, who was
not related to the groom in any way. And, the best man, who was kin to neither the groom or judge, was also named Ronald Legendre.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1597)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, January 21, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1598)
THESE "LUCKY" STUDENTS OBSERVED A HAZARD FIRST HAND
A lecture on vocational hazards, given at the Academy For Workplace Safety in Hennef, Germany, came to an abrupt
halt when the plaster ceiling suddenly fell on the entire classroom. The falling debris injured twelve students and brought the lecture
to an end.
THREE LOONEY LAWS
(1) In Maryland, it's against the law for grandchildren to marry their grandparents.
(2) In Delaware, it's against the law to pawn your wooden leg.
(3) In Hartford, Connecticut, carrying a cadaver by taxi is punishable by a $5 fine.
NOT THAT THE OTHER 9,900 WILL REMAIN CELIBATE
The English company Condomi, manufacturer of condoms, offered sexually active men and women 100 English pounds
weekly to give their product line "vigorous pleasure tests", while keeping detailed notes as to their likes or dislikes. The company's
marketing manager said they were overwhelmed with volunteers. And, with over 10,000, said it would take a bit of work to narrow the
number down to 100 people, who would "get lucky".
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1598)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, January 22, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1599)
THE MALE PASSENGERS MOSTLY SAW THE MOUNTAIN RANGES
In the mid 1990s a unique bus service in downtown Berlin toured each and every night. Not only did their
double-deckers provide tourists the sights of the Reichstag parliament building, the chancellery and Brandenburg Gate, but also bar
service, with drinks served by beautiful, young topless waitresses.
AND THE AMERICAN DIET HAS SUFFERED EVER SINCE
Some U.S. history books say that early European settlers in America, on the very first Thanksgiving in 1621, were
given popcorn for the first time by Chief Massasoit's brother, Quadequina. And what popcorn was left next morning, the settlers poured
milk upon, then ate their first puffed breakfast cereal.
AS THE OLD SAYING GOES, THAT'S WHY THEY CALL IT "DOPE"
In December 1995, James Mascetta, age 40, made a big mistake in a Nashua, New Hampshire, courtroom. He was caught
by the bailiff passing what turned out to be a packet of heroin, to a woman setting at the defendant's table. That woman was the
defendant in a trial for drug possession.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1599)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1600)
HIS SWEET TOOTH ROTTED HIS CHANCES OF FREEDOM
Oscar Martinez, 41, of Richmond, Texas, was arrested by police for driving with a suspended license. Sitting
handcuffed in a patrol car, Martinez asked officer David Bentley if he would mind going back to his car to get his unfinished banana
split? Officer Bentley agreed and returned to his prisoner's car, where on the front floorboard he found the banana split......and
something extra. On top of the melting dessert was a small square-shaped pack. Bentley decided to pour out the contents for inspection.
That's when he found several rocks of crack cocaine.
AND, IN TODAY'S WORLD, IT'S SURPRISING ANYBODY NOTICED
The Dallas Morning News tells of Caitlin Campbell, age 14, of Amarillo, Texas, who finished eighth-place
in a national spelling bee. This prompted the erection of a huge billboard in her hometown, downtown area to proclaim Miss Campbell's
accomplishment. Problem was, on the billboard they misspelled her name.
HIS NEIGHBORS BETTER BE GLAD HE DIDN'T COLLECT SNAKES
A Belgium newspaper tells of a lady living in the coastal town of Bredene, who was dumped by her bird-loving
boyfriend. To get revenge, she opened the doors of three aviaries and released some 350 of his feathered friends. Neighbors of the
boyfriend pitched-in and recovered all but about 100 in three days.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1600)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1601)
THAT SUBSTATION WASN'T THE ONLY THING BLOWING A LITTLE GAS
In June of 2006, the Daily Herald made note concerning the proposed building of a $381 million arena in
Louisville, Kentucky. Standing in the way was a Louisville Gas and Electric substation, which would be moved about 30 yards across the
street, for a price of $63 million.
TRAGICALLY, IF A MAN HITS ONCE, HE'LL HIT AGAIN
In June of 2006, The Dallas Morning News told of a Boise, Idaho, man, Alofa Time, age 50, pleading with
police to kill him, after he threw his murdered wife's head from his pickup truck; That is, just before driving head-on into a car,
killing Nina Murphy, age 36, and daughter Jae Lynne Grimes, 4. No worse for wear, the following day Time's bond was set at $1 million.
(His wife, 47-year-old Theresa Time, had a restraining order against her husband removed a month before her death.)
THEY USED A TORPEDO TO SHOOT THEMSELVES IN THE FOOT
On May 22, 1968, the USS Scorpion submarine was lost at sea with two nuclear weapons on board. While no one
can be sure unless the Scorpion is recovered, it is speculated one of the standard torpedoes on board became activated
accidentally and, to save the ship, the crew ejected it. The activated torpedo searched for and found the nearest target, which was the
Scorpion. All 99 men on board were killed.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1601)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, January 25, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1602)
OR, BUY THEM PLANE TICKETS
The Associated Press reported on June 22, 2006, South Texas ranchers, sick of having their privacy fences
slashed by illegal immigrants trying to avoid Border Patrol checkpoints, have installed rudimentary ladders along the fences, hoping
migrants will take the easy route.
THEY THOUGHT HE SNIFFED HIS WIFE'S ASHES UP HIS NOSE
The Fortean Times tells of an elderly man sitting in a British pub, when police jumped on and arrested him
for drug possession. Turns out the bag of white powder that caused the altercation was his wife Alice's ashes, which he carried
everywhere.
IF HE DROVE FAST ENOUGH, SHE'D GET BUGS BETWEEN HER TEETH
Banning California police pulled over Wayne Hall because his cousin, 23-year-old Teresa Brantley, was standing in
the front seat totally naked, with her upper half sticking through the sunroof. Mr. Hall was arrested on drunk driving charges.
Ms. Brantley received her arrest for public intoxication and indecent exposure.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1602)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, January 26, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1603)
HE LET HIS NOSE GET IN THE WAY
In April of 2006, a team of policemen in Elgin, Illinois, ran a "sting" operation. First they sent informant
Robert Bridges, 29, into a drug house with $300 to buy 7 grams of cocaine. But when his signal didn't come in thrice the allotted time,
the team stormed the house. Inside they found Mr. Bridges, high and detached, no money, with only 2.8 grams of cocaine left.
PROBABLY ONLY IF THEY ENJOY HAVING THEIR TUSHES TOUCHED
Reuters reports from Berlin, clairvoyant Ulf Buck, 40, a blind German psychic, reads naked buttocks instead
of palms to predict his client's futures. Buck told the news service that by running his fingers along a person's "butt lines" he can
advise them in matters of money, family, health and happiness.
3 GREAT QUOTES
(1) "If you see a snake, just kill it - don't appoint a committee on snakes." H. Ross Perot
(2) "I always advise people never to give advice." P.G. Wodehouse
(3) "It is fatal to look hungry. It makes people want to kick you." George Orwell.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1603)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, January 27, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1604)
HE ACTED LIKE ANDY AND OPIE HEADIN' FOR THE FISHING HOLE
Deion's mug
shot
In June of 1996, Dallas Cowboys superstar Deion Sanders was fishing with a friend when police reeled him in
for trespassing on property owned by the Southwest Florida International Airport. He was arrested on a first-degree misdemeanor charge.
Police said Sanders, whose home is a short distance away, was warned at least twice before. Quoted in USA Today, Sanders said,
"The only defense I have is that I'm sorry, but they were biting."
APPARENTLY HE DIDN'T MEASURE UP TO THE JOB?
Frank Jordan(r)
When San Francisco mayor Frank Jordan ran for re-election in 1995, he accepted an invitation from two local
radio (KRQR-FM) DJs to take a shower with them in the nude. Pictures of the event circulated the city, and Mayor Jordan was soundly
defeated in a landslide.
HE CLEARED HIS THROAT, BUT NOT TO MAKE A SPEECH
Salad Anyone?
Reuters news service from Berlin reported a German judge fined a 32-year-old pizza delivery driver the
equivalent of $600 for spitting in the salad of a couple because he had to make a second trip to deliver it. After finding a large
globule of phlegm under a piece of sliced cucumber, the couple called police. (Laboratory tests on the driver's spit confirmed his
guilt.)
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1604)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, January 28, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1605)
THE LATE, THE SKINNY, DR. ALICE CHASE
The book Nutrition for Health by Dr. Alice Chase remains for sale on the internet, long after Dr. Chase
herself died from malnutrition.
THIS FELLOW WAS MORE THAN LATE FOR WORK
A 33-year-old would-be bank robber decided to drink a bottle of schnapps for courage before entering a bank in
Graz, Australia. But several hours later police found him asleep in his "get away" car, mask, pistol and empty schnapps bottle on the
seat beside him. Authorities told Reuters he would still have to face an attempted robbery charge.
3 QUIZZICAL COMMENTS FROM BASEBALL GREAT YOGI BERRA
(1) "Don't always follow the crowd, because nobody goes there anymore. It's too crowded."
(2) "During the years ahead, when you come to the fork in the road, take it."
(3) "Remember that whatever you do in life, ninety percent of it is half mental."
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1605)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, January 29, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1606)
THE HIGHEST AND DEEPEST PLACES ON EARTH
The peak of Mt. Everest at 29,035 ft. (8,850 meters) is the highest point on earth. The Mariana Trench, located in
the Pacific Ocean near Japan, is the deepest at 35,798 feet (10,911 meters) below sea level. That is 28 times as deep as the Empire
State Building is tall.
THREE FUN TRIVIA
(1) Levi Strauss didn't call his pants "jeans". He called them "waist overalls."
(2) Last 2 European countries to let women vote: Switzerland (1971) and Liechtenstein (1984).
(3) Pole results show 30% of people asked to participate in an opinion poll refuse.
IN THIS CASE A HEART ATTACK WAS BETTER THAN A STROKE
Pedro Brugada, a well known cardiologist in Brussels, Belgium, was participating in a golf tournament in that city
when he had a heart attack and fell to the ground. Another golfer, also a doctor, discovered Brugada's heart was not beating, and did
CPR until an ambulance could arrive and take him to the hospital. When he awoke in the emergency room a half-hour later, Brugada
"escaped", caught a cab and went back to win the tournament.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1606)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1607)
THEY COULD COVER THEIR PIMPLES AND ROB THE PLACES
The Warrawong shopping center in New South Wales, Australia has a couple of unique ways to discourage teenage
loiterers. First, the music coming over the sound system is Bing Crosby's 1938 hit, "My Heart is Taking Lessons." Also, according to
Sydney's Daily Telegraph, pink fluorescent lighting is used to illuminate the shops, causing the teens' pimples to standout more
grossly.
NOW HE CAN GET 10% OFF ON MANICURES
ABC News reported on June 27, 2006 that a young woman living in Corpus Christi, Texas, had received a small gift
in a box from the boyfriend she had just broken up with. Inside the box she not only found a well washed severed human finger, but also
a note: " This is my last chance to touch you."
HE HAD A CLOSE "BRUSH WITH DEATH", LITERALLY
In November 1995 Kevin Hunt, 17, of London, England, underwent surgery to remove a toothbrush from his stomach. It
got there because Mr. Hunt brushed his teeth while taking a shower. All had gone well, doing two things at once, until shampoo got in
his eyes. When he threw his head back to wash the soap away, his 7-inch toothbrush slid down his throat.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1607)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1608)
HE CAUSED THE DEATHS OF HALF HIS COUNTRY'S POPULATION
By 1865 the President of Paraguay, Francisco Solano Lopez, had developed what is called a Napoleonic complex,
making him feel his army could conquer the world. He got off to a flying start by declaring war on his 3 neighboring countries,
Argentina, Brazil and Uruguay. But Lopez's delusions of grandeur were not enough. His army was destroyed, and almost half the population
of Paraguay killed.
SEEMS THE WORLD IS ALWAYS WOUND UP TOO TIGHTLY
On June 28, 1914, Archduke Francis Ferdinand of Austria and his wife, Sofia, were assassinated in Sarajevo,
becoming the final straw precipitating World War I. The war then caused the deaths of an estimated 8,500,000 soldiers, wounded of over
19,000,000, while killing about 13,000,000 civilians.
SHE STAYED OUT OF PRISON FOR ONLY FOUR HOURS
When Sheila Tavarez was released from a Florida prison in March of 1994, the first and main goal she had was to
share her 275 pound body with her boyfriend, who'd broken up with her because of the jail time. But when she arrived at the grocery
where he worked, he refused to have anything to do with her. This caused this large, rejected woman to lift her thirty-four-year-old
ex-lover off his feet, throw him down inside that store's cold storage locker, and try making love on the spot. When he could not
"participate" because of fear and the cold, Ms. Tavarez made him promise to meet her in two hours, then left. The shivering store clerk
immediately called police, and they met with Ms. Tavarez, instead, two hours later.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1608)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, February 01, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1609)
ONLY THING HE CAN PLEAD IN COURT IS "STUPID"
During an evening in August 1995, a twenty-four-year-old Floridian, Israel Martinez, had too much to drink and
decided to break into a building, hoping to steal anything of value. For this he climbed the first fence he found, ripped the screen
off a window, then crawled inside. Next, as Martinez stood up to brush the dust off himself, two policemen entered the room, put him
under arrest and placed him in a cell, immediately. That's because the drunken would-be burglar had broken into the Glades Correctional
Institution.
A POOR TRANSLATION TURNED IT INTO A CRAPPY AD
The Sumitomo Corporation of Japan made a bad choice when they hired a Japanese advertising agency to market their
extremely strong metal pipe in the U.S.A., in English. That's because the product, Sumitomo High Toughness' slogan used only the
initials, and proclaimed: "SHT - from Sumitomo," and "Now Sumitomo brings SHT to the United States." And, finally, "SHT was made to
match its name."
FOR SOME, MONEY BURNS HOLES IN THEIR POCKETS, OTHERS...
According to the daily Aftonbladet newspaper, a Swedish man in the southern city of Jonkoping became so
upset his wife was divorcing him, he converted all their mutual funds and stocks to cash (about 700,000 crowns, or $81,000), took a
match and burned it all.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1609)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, February 02, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1610)
MORE FUN TRIVIA
Ever wonder where the saying "getting off on the right foot" came from? The ancient Romans believed entering a
building on their left foot would cause bad luck. At one time the belief was so strong, guards were posted at doorways to make sure
everyone entering that building did so on their right foot.
CHICKENS, COWS, GOATS, ROCKET LAUNCHERS......WOW!
Reuters news service reported Cambodia's King Norodom Sihanouk was calling for a halt in using live animals
on that country's one and only firing range, near Phnom Penh, the capital. He said the image of their country was being tarnished by
allowing tourists and other visitors to shoot buffalo, cows, goats and chickens. The government-run shooting range had seen everything
from automatic weapons to rocket launchers fired.
SHE BECAME BROKEN HEARTED OVER HER BUCKS
Etta Stephens of Tampa, Florida, filed a lawsuit against Barnett Bank in 1995, claiming they caused her heart
attack. The bank had mailed her money market statement with a printing error, stating her $20,000 investment account contained $00.00.
This, Ms. Stevens claimed, had caused her severe chest pains and unconsciousness. (The bank apologized.)
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1610)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, February 03, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1611)
"AH SHOOT", IT COULD NOT
The Le Parisian newspaper reports a would be robber in Paris made the mistake of trying to rob a gun shop
with a toy pistol. The gun shop owner, being an expert on guns, immediately saw the weapon was harmless, pulled out one of his many
guns, then called police.
BUMPER STICKERS
(1) What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit-bull
(2) Rehab is for quitters
(3) Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
(4) Very funny Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
(5) Always remember you're unique, like everyone else
(6) Give me ambiguity... or give me something else.
THIS HAPPENS WHEN THE SEXUAL MIND IS ALL THAT'S LEFT
Seventy-nine-year-old John Papuga, of Macomb Township, Michigan, called police claiming his eighty-year-old next
door neighbor, Frances Breiholz, was trying to seduce him by leaving love notes, whispering romantic innuendoes over the phone, and
blowing kisses each time he left his house. Miss Breiholz, on the other hand, says "old man pompous" Papuga was crazy and it was all in
his head.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1611)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, February 04, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1612)
SHAVING? CUT TENDON? WHAT REALLY HAPPENED, HASSELHOFF??
On July 1, 2006, The United Press reported David Hasselhoff, movie star and Judge on TV's America's Got
Talent, had surgery on his right arm after a freak shaving accident. According to that service, Hasselhoff bumped his head on a
chandelier, while shaving in a London hotel gym, causing flying glass to cut a tendon on his right arm, which required surgery and an
overnight stay in the hospital.
THIS HAPPENS WHEN A GOVERNMENT RUNS THE HEALTH SYSTEM
London's Guardian tells of the difficulties in having one's teeth maintained by dentists in England. One
example, printed in April of 2006, said 6,000 do-it-yourself-crown-and-cap-replacement kits were sold out in only a few weeks.
JAILED FOR PUTTING DRUG ADDICTS OUT OF THEIR MISERY???
Two men were arrested in Detroit, Michigan, for selling a lethal form of heroin, which had caused the deaths of
more than 100 drug addicts. Wayne County Sheriff's department said the men had been mixing heroin with the prescription drug fentanyl,
making it lethal. (Of course, this also automatically lowers the crime rate and jail overcrowding.)
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1612)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, February 05, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1613)
BECAUSE OF "BOOBS" THESE BOOBS WENT HOME BROKE
Reuters news service from Bogotá, Colombia, reports local police there received complaints about three
young women who were covering their breasts with a powerful drug, then asking strangers (men of course) to lick them. When the men
passed out, the female thieves were taking their money and jewelry, then disappearing.
HE MUST'VE DELIVERED ONE LETTER TOO MANY?
Workers at a Denver Colorado Postal Service annex were surprised when a fellow worker, John Pitney, reported for
work wearing a dress. They sent him home. The following day he returned wearing (in addition to his dress), a gorilla mask, a snap-on
sexual device and several firearms. This time, police were called and Pitney was taken to jail for a full evaluation.
A CASE OF ULTIMATE PERSUASION
A Laguna Beach, Florida, man filed a lawsuit against his soon to be ex-wife for making him sign their divorce
papers under threats of bodily harm. He told the judge she hired two large men to hold a flaming torch up to his "manhood" while he
signed the divorce papers.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1613)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1614)
WARNING: NEWSPAPERS CAN GIVE YOUR NEW PUPPY CANCER
For obvious reasons, when the Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) announced in 1985 that the oils
in newspaper inks caused cancer and ink barrels should be labeled with this information, newspapers gave it almost no news coverage.
HERE'S A MALPRACTICE LAWSUIT THE PATIENT IS BOUND TO WIN
The Austrian Kurier reports a female patient is suing a hospital in the province of Carinthia after
enduring abdominal surgery, awake, for 45 minutes, unable to move or call for help (she'd been given a muscle relaxant) because the
staff forgot to hook up the machine to pump the anesthetic. The operation would have continued longer, had a nurse not noticed tears in
the woman's eyes. She later sued for 70,000 Euros.
HE MUST HAVE BEEN OUT OF PRACTICE?
A Kuwaiti man was rushed to hospital with severe back pains and exhaustion caused by his honeymoon, reports the
al-Watan. The new groom had to be carried on the shoulders of friends to an ambulance, after making love to his new 17-year-old
bride six times a day for six days in a row. Before collapsing, he told them he felt dizzy and the excruciating back pain was more than
he could bear.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1614)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1615)
HE'S PASSING TIME IN JAIL AFTER PASSING A DIAMOND NECKLACE
Reuters news service reports from Boca Raton, Florida, the arrest of a burglary suspect who, when cornered,
swallowed the evidence, a necklace containing 83 diamonds totaling 30 carats. After being placed in a cell, the suspect's every
"movement" was collected and examined for loose diamonds, until the entire piece passed. (The owner, knowing where her jewelry had been,
placed it up for sale on eBay.)
NOW YOU KNOW
Jim Muir, sales manager for Wolverine World Wide, Inc., was driving through the southern U.S. (year not known),
when he stopped for lunch at a roadside diner. There, when he asked what the fried balls of corn dough on his plate were, he was told
"hush puppies." Local farmers called them hush puppies because they often threw them to their dogs at night to stop barking. This caused
Muir to think of the new pigskin shoes his company was about to place on the market, and decided then-and-there the name for them would
be Hush Puppies. Why? Because the new footwear could soothe the wear's feet, silencing their "barking dogs."
AN EPITAPH
At Tombstone, Arizona's, Boot Hill cemetery: "Here lies John Timothy Snow, who died for a lady's honor (She wanted
to keep it)".
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1615)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, February 08, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1616)
HE WAS FAIRLY WRONG IN NOT FORECASTING A RAINY DAY
Television weather forecasters are used to viewers complaints when their predictions aren't accurate. But a lady
in Haifa, Israel, went so far as to take both the meteorologist and his television station to court over a poor prediction. In court,
the complainant claimed her faith in the forecast had caused her to dress for a sunny day, when, in reality, it rained, causing her to
catch the flu, miss work and spend money on a doctor and prescription drugs, not to mention the actual pain and discomfort.
SQUATTERS' RIGHTS UNDER DIFFERENT CONDITIONS
Back in 1910 few U.S. homes had indoor toilets. So after the Pennsylvania Railroad built one inside its station in
Terre Haute, Indiana, locals kept the facility occupied so much of the time, regular train passengers often "had to hold it" or miss
their trains. That caused the railroad to install coin-operated locks. They gave the station manager the keys so those with train
tickets could use the facility for free.
AND YOU CAN BET THEY WORK CHEAP
Police in New Delhi, India, according to the Hindustan Times newspaper, have found a more accurate way to
test the purity of drugs such as hashish and heroin other than using drug kits or dogs. They hire and pay seasoned addicts to use and
grade the confiscated drugs. Heavy users, they say, have proven to be more accurate than any other testing method devised.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1616)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Friday, February 09, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1618)
ONE OF DALLAS' FINEST?
The Dallas Morning News reported on July 8, 2006, off-duty Dallas police officer Andrew Pagel was injured
early Saturday morning when his handgun accidentally discharged inside the Red River Saloon. Officer Pagel, a three year veteran, was
riding a mechanical bull about 1:35 a.m., when his handgun accidentally discharged, sending him to University Medical Center with a
bullet wound near his right ankle.
POGO'S WALT KELLY: WE HAVE MET THE ENEMY AND HE IS US
In March of 1942, while escorting a convoy in the Arctic, the HMS Trinidad fired a torpedo at a German
destroyer. Possibly affected by the icy waters, the gyro mechanism of the torpedo caused it to form a circular arc. In less than a
minute, it returned to blast a large hole in the ship's engine room.
HE GOT ALL CHOKED UP OVER A FISH
One afternoon in July of 1996, Brazilian angler Nathon do Nascimento was fishing on the shores of the Maguari
River, when he decided to stretch his head back and yawned broadly. At that instant, a fish jumped from the water and landed headfirst
in his mouth, wedging inside his throat. With less than an inch of fish tail protruding, fellow fishermen were helpless, and after
several minutes of agonizing struggle, Nascimento suffocated to death.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1618)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Saturday, February 10, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1620)
THIS ROBBERY PROCEDURE REALLY SUCKED
A gang of 4 motorcycle riders roared to a stop in front of a wealthy Paris neighborhood jewelry store, smashed the
glass in the show window, then used a battery operated vacuum strong enough to empty the entire showcase in only seconds. After that,
job complete, they all rode away.
5 ACTUAL NEWSPAPER HEADLINES
(1) Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
(2) War Dims Hope For Peace
(3) Lung Cancer In Women Mushrooms
(4) Plane Too Close To Ground, Crash Probe Told
(5) Chef Throws His Heart Into Helping Feed Needy
THE LESSON HERE IS AS OLD AS MANKIND
During a heavy snow period in the winter of 1979, Allied Roofing and Siding Company in Grand Rapids, Michigan,
saved many roofs in the area by removing the snow before the accumulated weight could cause them to cave in. However, one of the few
that did collapse was at Allied Roofing and Siding Company.
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1620)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Sunday, February 11, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1621)
DID THE FOUNDING FATHERS REVEL IN THE U.S. CONSTITUTION?
A lot of the delegates at the Constitutional Convention hated the Constitution so much, compromises had to be made
for it to pass. Alexander Hamilton called the final draft a "weak and worthless fabric." Fifteen delegates refused to sign it, and even
the Constitution's strongest supporters saw it as little more than a stopgap measure, hoping in a few years another delegation could
pass something better.
BET THIS MADE THAT LITTLE GIRL FEEL TOTALLY WORTHLESS!
The Herald-Sun reports from Melbourne, Australia, about a local man who had been paying child support,
until DNA proved he was not the father, and was now suing the mother for $10,000 in repayment. Some expenditures listed in his court
document are these: Dinners at McDonald's for 5 years, 4 visits to an amusement park, three Barbie dolls, a Pooh Bear play tent, skating
sessions and child support payments.
THIS TEMPORARY THIEF OBVIOUSLY WORKED FOR AN AIRLINE
Jess and Judy Daniel of Grapevine, Texas, wondered why anyone would steal the small synthetic duck sitting on
their front lawn. They were even more puzzled 20 months later. That's when one morning they found their duck had returned. And beside
the duck sat a box filled with photos, all photos of the duck, each time "posing" before a famous world landmark. Some included in the
backdrops were the Eiffel Tower, Great Pyramid, Leaning Tower of Pisa, Taj Mahal, Great Wall of China,...............
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1621)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Monday, February 12, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1622)
ESCAPING A BIG CAGE INSIDE A SMALLER ONE
Toby Young, 48, was sentenced to 21 months behind bars on July 12, 2006, for helping convicted murderer John
Manard, 27, escape from prison in a dog cage. Young ran a dog training program at Lansing Correctional Facility in Leavenworth County,
Kansas, and she had hidden Mr. Manard inside a cage in a stack, before it was trucked outside the facility.
PROVING AGAIN NOTHING IS NEW UNDER THE SUN
Even the great English playwright William Shakespeare (1564-1616) had to get his ideas some place. The story of
Romeo and Juliet, for instance, had been passed among writers since the 14th century, until Shakespeare read a poem by Arthur Brooke,
using Romeo and Juliet in the title.
SWAZILAND POLITICIANS KILL FOR LUCK
Just before October parliamentary elections in Swaziland, King Mswati III gave a televised speech, which began,
"During election time, we tend to lose our grandmothers, grandfathers and young children. But I want to warn you all that you should not
resort to ritual murder." (In Swaziland, candidates ritually commit murders during their campaigns, believing it will bring them good
luck.)
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1622)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1623)
DON'T SING THE OLD RUGGED CROSS, CHA-CHA-CHA
In May 2006, according to the Times Online, many British churches have installed the new Hymnal Plus, a
Karaoke machine to help congregations recite verses and sing hymns, including risky tunes such as a disco version of "Amazing Grace."
ONE OF THESE DAYS MAYBE SHE'LL RUN INTO HERSELF?
On July 15, 2006, The Dallas Morning News Reported on Ms. Audra Schmierers, 33, a stay-at-home mother, who
received a bill from the IRS demanding $15,000 in unpaid taxes. After that, and in the months to follow, her tax debt continued to
climb, until it reached $1 million. She eventually learned her identity had been stolen, and 81 other people in North Texas were using
her social security number to get jobs, but not paying taxes.
5 MORE ACTUAL HEADLINES FROM NEWSPAPERS
(1) Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
(2) Never Withhold Herpes Infection From Loved Ones
(3) Miners Refuse to Work After Death
(4) Two Sisters Reunite After 18 Years at Checkout Counter
(5) Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66 (In reference to a golf tournament.)
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1623)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1624)
WHAT A CRACKER JACK IDEA!
In 1893, at Chicago's 100th birthday celebration and World's Fair, F.W. Rueckheim and his brother, Louis, had
several booths selling a new item, popcorn and peanuts mixed together and coated with caramel. It sold so well, when the fair closed,
Rueckheim started packaging his mix, and selling it nationally, using a contemporary, slang expression for something that is top of the
line: Cracker Jack.
5 MORE FACTUAL AND FUNNY NEWSPAPER HEADLINES
(1) Prostitutes Appeal to Pope
(2) Lack of Brains Hinders Research
(3) Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
(4) Organ Festival Ends in Smashing Climax
(5) Man Struck by Lightening Faces Battery Charge
EVEN TOTAL EQUALITY WOULD GENERATE ITS OWN BIGOTS
According to the publication The World's Greatest Blunders, during African location shootings for an
upcoming series to be shown by the British Broadcasting Corporation, white film extras were paid up to 5-times more than black extras.
Name of this documentary? The Fight Against Slavery
Andrew J. Hewett
(#1624)
Copyright ©2006-2008 Andrew J.
Hewett. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, or
redistributed without the consent of the author.
Thursday, February 15, 2007
WEIRD, BIZARRE and UNUSUAL (#1626)
HE TRADED FUNNY-MONEY FOR FREE ROOM AND BOARD, IN PRISON
A slowwitted counterfeiter in Orlando, Florida, decided to be different, and set up his operation to print zlotys
(Polish currency). Problem was he couldn't print and pass enough phony money to make a profit before his arrest. Police estimated he
spent $19,000 setting up his operation. It took three zloty bills to equal the value of $1 in U.S. currency.
WONDER IF THEY HAVE ANY "SELF-SERVICE" GAS STATIONS?
China's official news agency, Xinhua, reports gas stations in western China are providing an incentive to
customers by offering sex with each tank of gas. There are about 1,000 gas stations in that region of Ningxia, and, according to one
station operator, "Sometimes it's hard to tell if a customer com